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Blink 3 of 8 - The 5 AM Club
by Robin Sharma
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The Curious History of Dating summary
Nichi Hodgson
From Jane Austen to Tinder
30 mins
Brief summary
The Curious History of Dating by Nichi Hodgson is a fascinating exploration of the evolution of dating customs and norms throughout history, challenging modern assumptions and shedding light on the universal experiences of love and relationships.
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The Curious History of Dating
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Status marriages were the norm in the 1700s before the early Victorian Era made romance more acceptable.
When we look back at the history of interaction between men and women in the United Kingdom some of it sounds very quaint, and some of it sounds very familiar.
Just consider the phenomenon of “courtesy” manuals, which found a readership right up to the end of the seventeenth century. These were read by men – the pick-up artists of their day – so that they could charm their way into a lady’s knickers.
But times were changing. It was the age of Jane Austen. And, if you’re familiar with her novels, you’ll know that marriages in the late 1700s were rather more concerned with social status and money than with love. If both parties scored those assets, then you’d have a “good” marriage on your hands.
The consequences for courting were clear. Instead of lightweight sweet talk, men started appealing directly to women’s – or perhaps their fathers’ – reasoning. Your best assets were a respectable character and robust bank account.
Consequently, people’s attitudes toward dating changed: they knew what they wanted and what they could offer. Before long, the number of Lonely Hearts ads in the daily press multiplied.
Of course, the wealthy did not resort to placing ads. They had “the Season” in London. It ran from March to June and was stuffed full of balls and galas. Families sent their daughters along to be seen in public and snapped up by potential husbands.
They were pretty stiff affairs. Dress rules and codes of conduct were very strict. Even the smallest slip up might result in a young woman being overlooked for the rest of the season.
Thankfully, such status-led dating gave way to romance in the 1800s. This change of attitude was partly sparked by Queen Victoria’s very public affection for her husband, Prince Albert. She even proposed to him!
Valentine’s Day cards also took off in this period. Though they’re now considered a classic romantic gesture, it was the arrival of cheap paper and new printing techniques that helped popularize them.
In 1836, 60,000 cards were sent in Britain, rising to an incredible 400,000 in 1840. The introduction of a cheap public postal service meant their numbers tripled again by 1871.
However, this new romancing was still heavily influenced by gender and class norms. A lady of high rank could hardly elevate a lower-class lover through marriage. That liberty was only allowed to gentlemen.
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What is The Curious History of Dating about?
The Curious History of Dating (2017) guides readers through the history of dating and relationships in the United Kingdom. From the formal dances and rules of the 1700s to the growth of online dating in recent years, these blinks show that dating and finding true love has always been a difficult affair. But thankfully, today it’s easier than ever before.
The Curious History of Dating Review
The Curious History of Dating (2019) by Nichi Hodgson explores the fascinating evolution of dating norms and rituals throughout history. Here's why this book is definitely worth your time:
- With its meticulous research and extensive knowledge, it offers a comprehensive understanding of how dating has shaped society.
- By delving into lesser-known historical anecdotes and sharing surprising insights, it keeps readers intrigued and engaged.
- The book provokes thought and discussion with its critical analysis of societal influences on dating and relationships, making it far from boring.
Best quote from The Curious History of Dating
Queen Victoria broke with tradition by being a woman who proposed to her partner on a day other than Leap Day, February 29th.
—Nichi Hodgson
Who should read The Curious History of Dating?
- Non-Brits confused about the etiquette for dating a Brit
- Long-term couples looking for some historically-based date inspiration
- Curious fans of British social history
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The Curious History of Dating FAQs
What is the main message of The Curious History of Dating?
Discover the intriguing journey of dating throughout history in The Curious History of Dating.
How long does it take to read The Curious History of Dating?
The reading time for The Curious History of Dating varies depending on the reader's speed. However, the Blinkist summary can be read in just 15 minutes.
Is The Curious History of Dating a good book? Is it worth reading?
The Curious History of Dating offers fascinating insights into the world of dating, making it a worthwhile read for anyone interested in relationships and cultural history.
Who is the author of The Curious History of Dating?
The author of The Curious History of Dating is Nichi Hodgson.
What to read after The Curious History of Dating?
If you're wondering what to read next after The Curious History of Dating, here are some recommendations we suggest:
- Social by Matthew D. Lieberman
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- Talk by Elizabeth Stokoe
- The Game by Neil Strauss
- Labor of Love by Moira Weigel
- Curious by Ian Leslie
- Games People Play by Eric Berne
- Atomic Habits by James Clear
- Fascinate by Sally Hogshead