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Relationship Goals

How to Win at Dating, Marriage, and Sex

By Michael Todd
15-minute read
Audio available
Relationship Goals by Michael Todd

Relationship Goals (2020) offers a blueprint for developing long-lasting relationships with your friends, your spouse, and God. Narrating his own experiences of heartache and healing, author Michael Todd examines common obstacles in modern relationships and gives tips for overcoming them. He also demonstrates how to set precise goals to help you aim for the right relationships.

  • Single people concerned about choosing the right partner
  • People of faith seeking to strengthen their relationships with God
  • Individuals struggling to maintain a healthy marriage

Michael Todd is the lead pastor of Transformation Church in Tulsa, Oklahoma. He speaks at a variety of churches, events, and conferences each year, including Elevation Church, C3 Conference, and Lakewood Church. Todd is also a proud husband, father to three children, and relationship counselor to his congregation.

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Relationship Goals

How to Win at Dating, Marriage, and Sex

By Michael Todd
  • Read in 15 minutes
  • Audio & text available
  • Contains 9 key ideas
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Relationship Goals by Michael Todd
Synopsis

Relationship Goals (2020) offers a blueprint for developing long-lasting relationships with your friends, your spouse, and God. Narrating his own experiences of heartache and healing, author Michael Todd examines common obstacles in modern relationships and gives tips for overcoming them. He also demonstrates how to set precise goals to help you aim for the right relationships.

Key idea 1 of 9

Above all, relationship goals have to be realistic.

If you’re active on social media, you’re probably inundated with pictures of perfect-looking couples. We’ve all seen them – images of happy pairs posing in clubs, kissing on the beach, or cuddled up in bed next to a caption reading #relationshipgoals. 

These images represent modern relationship ideals. But here’s the problem: these images are only snapshots of relationships. They emphasize all the good things and exclude all the bad. They don’t represent reality. Therefore, they’re not realistic relationship goals.

The issue isn’t just social media. Magazines, newspapers, and TV shows sell us an illusion of “perfect” relationships that we all buy into. As a result, we have unrealistic expectations about what kind of partners we should be looking for. 

The key message here is: Above all, relationship goals have to be realistic.

Often, our ideas about what makes a perfect partner are based on superficial things like looks, career, or a person’s financial situation. They reflect what we want and desire from a partner, rather than what we actually need. 

This was the case for Sarah, a member of the congregation at Transformation Church in Tulsa, Oklahoma, where the author is a pastor. Long past the age by which she’d thought she’d be married, Sarah was still single. This concerned her, and she’d often chat with the author about her relationship problems.

On one occasion, the author asked Sarah whether she had a clear idea about what kind of man she wanted to meet. She replied with a long, long list of requirements.

Sarah saw herself marrying a successful business owner, one who was also a preacher and funny and athletic. On top of all that, he had to come from a two-parent home – a requirement that eliminates about a third of the population!

As the requirements piled up, the author struggled to keep a straight face. Then he was honest with Sarah. Her relationship goals, he said, set the bar way too high. In fact, they had led her to reject great potential partners for years! 

The thing is, relationship goals can be great — if they help you aim for what you really want and need from a partner. But to do that, they have to be realistic. 

In the blinks that follow, we’ll look at creating the right relationship goals, ones that help you fulfill your life’s purpose and keep you in line with God’s eternal truths. 

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