Just Listen Book Summary - Just Listen Book explained in key points

Just Listen summary

Mark Goulston

Discover the Secret to Getting Through to Absolutely Anyone

Listen to the first key idea

Key idea 1 of 7
00:00
4.2 (167 ratings)
17 mins
7 key ideas
Audio & text

What is Just Listen about?

Just Listen (2009) combines time-tested persuasion and listening techniques with new methods to help you get your message across to anybody. By learning how to be a better listener, how the brain works and how people think, you’ll be able to motivate people to do what you want because you’ll better understand their needs.

About the Author

Mark Goulston is a psychiatrist, consultant, business coach and writer whose columns have appeared in Fast Company and Tribune Media Services. In addition, the Consumers’ Research Council of America has named him one of America’s top psychiatrists.

Key idea 1 of 7

Listening is a key to overcoming resistance and initiating progress.

Have you ever stopped to consider the rhythm of your everyday conversations? If so, you might have found that you approach them as if they were all rational arguments, and this can often be counterproductive.

In fact, using arguments or pressure to influence or convince others often creates resistance. This is especially true when people come to you in times of stress: they don’t want advice to improve their situation – they just want to share what’s going on with them.

Imagine a man named Steve is standing on the edge of a seventh-story roof, threatening to jump and kill himself. As authorities surround the building and prepare themselves for the cleanup, a negotiator, Lieutenant Williams, approaches Steve. Williams tries to convince Steve that there are other options available to him other than hurting himself, and tells him that he’s there to help him get out of this terrible situation.

Unfortunately, Steve doesn’t feel understood and responds angrily, rejecting Lt. Williams’s help.

The problem? Williams didn’t listen. Listening gives others the chance to share their feelings and concerns, which creates a space for taking the next steps and making arguments. When we feel like our concerns are being heard, it engenders a certain level of trust between us and our conversation partners.

Now imagine that another negotiator, Lieutenant Brown, arrives at the scene to talk to Steve. After listening to Steve, Brown tells him: “I bet you feel this is your only way out.”

“Yes,” Steve replies.

By listening, Brown is able to show Steve how he empathizes with his situation.

He asks Steve about how he lost his job, why his wife left him, and so on. Steve then starts to calm down and begins to explain his situation, while becoming more open to solutions other than killing himself.

If you want people to be open to your arguments, you have to listen first. And, as you’ll discover in the next few blinks, we’re biologically programmed to do just that.

Want to see all full key ideas from Just Listen?

Key ideas in Just Listen

More knowledge in less time
Read or listen
Read or listen
Get the key ideas from nonfiction bestsellers in minutes, not hours.
Find your next read
Find your next read
Get book lists curated by experts and personalized recommendations.
Shortcasts
Shortcasts New
We’ve teamed up with podcast creators to bring you key insights from podcasts.

Who should read Just Listen

  • Anyone who wants to improve their communication skills
  • Anyone working in therapy or mediation
  • Anyone who wants to be more persuasive

Categories with Just Listen

What our members say

Sven O.

It's highly addictive to get core insights on personally relevant topics without repetition or triviality. Added to that the apps ability to suggest kindred interests opens up a foundation of knowledge.

Thi Viet Quynh N.

Great app. Good selection of book summaries you can read or listen to while commuting. Instead of scrolling through your social media news feed, this is a much better way to spend your spare time in my opinion.

Jonathan A.

Life changing. The concept of being able to grasp a book's main point in such a short time truly opens multiple opportunities to grow every area of your life at a faster rate.

Renee D.

Great app. Addicting. Perfect for wait times, morning coffee, evening before bed. Extremely well written, thorough, easy to use.

Start growing with Blinkist now

25 Million
Downloads on all platforms
4.7 Stars
Average ratings on iOS and Google Play
91%
Of Blinkist members create a better reading habit*
*Based on survey data from Blinkist customers
Powerful ideas from top nonfiction

Try Blinkist to get the key ideas from 5,500+ bestselling nonfiction titles and podcasts. Listen or read in just 15 minutes.

Start your free trial