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How to Talk to Anyone

92 Little Tricks for Big Success in Relationships

By Leil Lowndes
  • Read in 19 minutes
  • Audio & text available
  • Contains 12 key ideas
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How to Talk to Anyone by Leil Lowndes
Synopsis

How To Talk to Anyone (1998) is an indispensable guide to improving your conversations and becoming more graceful and effective in your social interactions – no matter the situation. Leil Lowndes offers readers a treasure trove of techniques and tips that will help any socially awkward individual gain more confidence in workplace environments, meetings, their private lives and at parties.

Key idea 1 of 12

First impressions matter, so remember to smile and use welcoming body language.

Let’s not kid ourselves: first impressions are really important. When you meet someone for the first time, the way you look and act is seared into their brain, and it will undoubtedly influence any future dealings you have with that person.

The first thing someone sees is your face, so this is where a good first impression begins.

Did your mom ever tell you to always make sure you smile when you meet new people? You may have found it annoying at the time, but she was right. A smile can make a big difference in whether or not you win someone over.

People can spot a fake smile, however, so let the grin grow slowly, as this will make it appear more personal and genuine.

Studies show that a natural-looking smile is even more important among women. In corporate environments, women who are slower to smile are considered more credible.

Another tip is to avoid giving everyone in a group the same smile, as this can be off-putting. Try to vary your grin as you deal with different people.

Your eyes are also an important asset in winning people over – it has been proven that establishing steady eye contact will help you gain both respect and affection. If you want to improve a relationship, maintain eye contact with that person even if they’re not talking, and only break off that contact when you must.

Now, with your face sorted out, let’s move on to body language, which has a powerful influence on how you’re perceived by others.

For starters, it’s important to recognize that just because someone’s a stranger, it doesn’t mean you have to act like she’s one. Instead, when greeting someone for the first time, do so as if she were an old friend. Along with a warm smile, turn your body fully toward her so she can see you’re giving her your undivided attention.

You can also avoid falling out of her good graces by making sure not to fidget – which means keeping your hand gestures under control.

It may sound odd, but studies show that if you touch your face when you talk it makes you seem less credible – so keep calm, and keep your hands away from your face.

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