Who is the author of Reasons to Stay Alive?

The author of Reasons to Stay Alive is Matt Haig.

Psychology

Reasons to Stay Alive Book Summary - Reasons to Stay Alive Book explained in key points

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Reasons to Stay Alive summary

Name: Reasons to Stay Alive
Rating: 4.4 (338 reviews)
Author: Matt Haig

Matt Haig

An optimistic memoir about depression and anxiety

4.4 (338 ratings)

24 mins

Brief summary

"Reasons to Stay Alive" by Matt Haig is a memoir that explores the author's struggles with mental health and his journey to finding hope and happiness. It's a powerful reminder that things can and will get better, even in the darkest of times.

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Inspiration Mental Health Memoirs

Table of Contents

Reasons to Stay Alive
Summary of 8 key ideas

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Key idea 1 of 8

What’s in it for me? Become inspired to befriend your demons.

What would you do if, without warning, you were no longer able to make sense of the world around you? If the very fabric of your mind seemed to unravel, and you were suddenly unable to think?

In his early twenties, after experiencing a panic attack so severe that he was unable to leave the house, Matt Haig had to grapple with precisely these questions. The answers he arrived at are both inspired and inspiring. Rather than avoiding his discomfort, or numbing it with drugs and alcohol, he allowed himself to feel fully for the first time in his life.

In these blinks, you’ll learn how Haig developed a method of fighting fear with fear, and refused to allow himself to hide in his comfort zone. You’ll also learn how books became a lifeline for him, providing company when he was at his loneliest and giving him a language to understand his experiences.

In these blinks, you’ll discover

why being depressed made Abraham Lincoln a great leader;
how running and meditation can make us feel better; and
why men are more at risk of dying by suicide.

Matt Haig suddenly began to experience intense anxiety, and it affected every aspect of his life.

On a warm sunny day in Ibiza, Spain, Matt Haig experienced a rush of panic so intense that he couldn't get out of bed. He was 24 years old, and had been living in a beautiful villa with his girlfriend, working at a nightclub over the summer.

He'd been drinking a lot and was sometimes worried about what to do with his life, but up until then he hadn't felt particularly depressed. Then the panic began.

For three days, Haig could neither sleep nor get out of bed. The panic was constant, unrelenting. His heart pounded so hard he felt sure he would die.

The key message here is: Matt Haig suddenly began to experience intense anxiety, and it affected every aspect of his life.

At one stage, the feeling of panic became unbearable, and Haig seriously thought about taking his own life. He even went and stood at the edge of a cliff near the villa, willing himself to jump off. But the thought of the pain his death would cause his loved ones held him back.

His girlfriend, Andrea, was, understandably, very worried. She insisted they visit a doctor, who prescribed some tranquilizers. They didn't help much, but at least they dulled Haig’s senses long enough to allow him to return home to the United Kingdom, where his parents were anxiously waiting.

To an outsider, their lives in the United Kingdom might have seemed very peaceful. Haig lounged around the house, read the paper, did some cooking. But his thoughts were anything but peaceful. He was in the grip of a toxic combination of depression and anxiety. While the depression filled him with dark thoughts, making him feel worthless and futureless, the anxiety flooded him with constant panic.

Even a trip to the corner store became a major ordeal. Haig would set off to buy something simple like a bottle of milk, and start hyperventilating as soon as he left the house. He'd start hallucinating that demons were taunting him, or imagine that something terrible was about to happen.

Inside the shop, his anxiety would become even worse. He'd become so overwhelmed by all the products with their bright labels that he could barely find the milk. When he finally found it, he still had to suffer through a social interaction with the cashier, trying desperately to appear normal.

There were warning signs that could have alerted Haig to the coming breakdown.

Can intense anxiety and depression really strike like a bolt from the blue? Such a bolt seemed to have struck Haig. The abrupt onset of what he describes as his “breakdown” was terrifying. It felt as though a switch had been flipped in his brain, triggering a sudden malfunction. However, in retrospect, he can see that he started feeling anxious long before the panic attacks he experienced in Ibiza.

The key message in this blink is: There were warning signs that could have alerted Haig to the coming breakdown.

We don't know exactly what causes anxiety and depression, and there is no one-size-fits-all way to fix it.

Modern medicine has come up with cures for ailments that, just a few decades ago, seemed incurable. HIV is now no longer a death sentence, and childbirth is not an experience that women have to fear. We've become used to finding scientific answers to all our problems.

Unfortunately, the scientific research is much less conclusive when it comes to depression. What causes it? How can we fix it? There is no definitive answer. And there are many conflicting theories.

People with depression, and especially men, suffer from social isolation.

If you break your leg, you get a cast and crutches. People can immediately see that something has happened to you and will often try to help. Strangers will give up their seat on the bus. Friends will drop off groceries. It’s not easy. But at least people know to treat you with care.

Depression and anxiety aren’t only hard to handle; they’re invisible. Haig could be in the grip of a terrible panic attack, but from the outside he would just seem a bit slow or distracted. A very observant person might notice that his pupils were dilated, but they'd have no idea what he was really going through.

Books became a lifeline for Haig because they gave him language to understand his experience.

Imagine you’re trying to explain something to a good friend. You open your mouth; you form the words; but your friend doesn’t understand you. You try and you try, but it’s as though you’re speaking gibberish, and your friend only stares at you uncomprehendingly.

That was how the author felt after his breakdown. He felt utterly unable to explain to family and friends how he was feeling. Their worldview was so different from his that it was like – to use the author’s words – “trying to describe earth to aliens.” What made it worse was that he could barely explain his experience himself. He was so buried in the depression and anxiety that he lost all perspective on his own situation.

Haig started to recover by running toward what he most feared.

A few months after his breakdown, Haig woke up and thought idly about the day ahead. Then he realized with a shock that the thought hadn't been laced with any anxiety. It was just neutral. It was the first time he'd felt calm for months. A few days later, he enjoyed the feeling of sun on his face. This, too, was a novel experience: he hadn't registered feelings of pleasure for a long time. These interludes of calm gave him hope. They seemed like small but promising signs that he could get better.

The key message here is: Haig started to recover by running toward what he most feared.

Having anxiety and depression can make you more perceptive and empathetic.

It may surprise you to hear that Abraham Lincoln struggled with depression. So did Winston Churchill. Both of these men were formidably ambitious and had impressive careers. They also spent large parts of their lives feeling anxious and depressed.

While it's sometimes said that they achieved so much in spite of their depression, you could also formulate it differently. Perhaps they were able to achieve what they did because they had experienced anxiety and depression.

Recovery from depression isn't linear.

People often think of recovery moving in a straight line. That you'll move slowly upward from mental distress to health, and be “cured.”

The reality is much messier. Fourteen years after having the breakdown in Ibiza, Haig has stopped waiting to completely recover. He's realized that his moods will go up and down, and that he won't always feel good. What he knows now is that anxious states will pass. And that life can be richer and more enjoyable than he ever would have imagined while in the grip of the breakdown.

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What is Reasons to Stay Alive about?

Reasons to Stay Alive (2015) tells the story of Matt Haig’s struggle with depression and anxiety, which was so severe that he had constant panic attacks and feared leaving the house. It reveals how Haig learned to channel his natural intensity into the creation of art and developed some unusual techniques for easing his distressed mind.

Reasons to Stay Alive Review

Reasons to Stay Alive (2015) by Matt Haig is a powerful memoir that offers a candid and uplifting account of the author's battle with depression and anxiety. Here's why this book is worth reading:

Through honest and raw storytelling, it provides a real and relatable perspective on mental health, shedding light on the struggles and triumphs.
Combining personal experiences, research, and reflections, it gives valuable insights and practical strategies for coping, offering hope and inspiration to those who are fighting their own battles.
The book's poignant and introspective tone keeps readers captivated, ensuring that the topic never becomes dull or lacking in emotional depth.

Best quote from Reasons to Stay Alive

If you find it hard enough to let yourself be free, your self breaks in, flooding your mind in an attempt to drown all those failed half-versions of you.

—Matt Haig

Who should read Reasons to Stay Alive?

Memoir lovers who want to read a heartfelt story of personal growth
Social workers and psychologists who want a glimpse of what’s going on in their clients’ heads
People struggling with depression and anxiety who want to borrow some faith and optimism

About the Author

Matt Haig is the author of the widely acclaimed memoirs Reasons to Stay Alive and Notes on a Nervous Planet. He’s also the author of six best-selling novels for adults, including How to Stop Time, The Humans and The Radleys. He’s sold over a million books in the United Kingdom, and his work has been translated into over 40 languages.

Categories with Reasons to Stay Alive

Psychology Health & Nutrition Biography & Memoir

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