Help Me! Book Summary - Help Me! Book explained in key points

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Help Me! summary

Name: Help Me!
Rating: 4.1 (195 reviews)
Author: Marianne Power

Marianne Power

One Woman's Quest to Find Out If Self-Help Really Can Change Her Life

4.1 (195 ratings)

28 mins

Brief summary

'Help Me!' by Marianne Power is a memoir/self-help book that chronicles the author's journey of trying one self-help book per month for a year. Power's experiences are relatable, funny, and heartfelt, making this a compelling and insightful read.

Topics

Women's Stories Self-Help

Table of Contents

Help Me!
Summary of 11 key ideas

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Key idea 1 of 11

What’s in it for me? Find out if there is such a thing as too much self-help.

At the age of 36, Marianne Power was disappointed with life. Despite a successful career and a lifestyle that many would envy, she was plagued by unhappiness and anxiety. These feelings eventually pushed her to start a 16-month journey of self-improvement. Armed with self-help books, she tackled her flaws one by one to see if her life would change.

Marianne embraced rejection, committed to 10-day plans, and contemplated guardian angels. She even attended her own funeral. In doing all this, she tested her boundaries, put her personal relationships on the line, and unearthed truths about herself. These blinks share what she learned and how it changed her.

In these blinks, you’ll learn

how a hangover changed Marianne’s life;
what walking across a bed of hot coals can do for you; and
what Marianne learned from a bald cabbie.

A nasty hangover kicked off Marianne’s quest for perfection.

Can you think back to moments that made you reevaluate a situation and gave you just the push you needed to make a change? Maybe an unreasonable request from your boss helped you finally quit a job you hated? Or a chance meeting inspired you to move and start a new chapter in your life?

We all come to turning points like these. For Marianne, it was a painful Sunday morning after a night of drinking.

The key message here is: A nasty hangover kicked off Marianne’s quest for perfection.

While she grappled with a pounding headache and a queasy stomach, anxiety and feelings of failure took center stage. Even though she felt fortunate to be making a good living as a freelance writer in London, the 36-year-old was unhappy.

Marianne’s friends and peers seemed to be moving forward in life. They were getting married, starting families, and buying houses. But without a partner, a house to her name, or a plan for the future, Marianne felt stuck in a rut.

And it wasn’t the first time.

More than 10 years before, Marianne had been miserable in her job. So she’d turned to a self-help book for guidance. The book surprised her. It gave her the confidence to leave her job and jumpstart her journalism career. After that, Marianne was hooked on self-help. She read any and every book that promised more money, the love of her life, and career success.

Except none of those things materialized. Despite all the self-help she devoured, Marianne’s finances never improved. Her dream man was nowhere to be seen. Sure, she had a successful career, but this was all down to a work ethic driven by fear.

Then, on that hungover Sunday, Marianne had not one, but two, lightbulb moments.

First, she realized that all the time she’d been reading self-help books, she’d never acted on the advice they gave her. This, she thought, was why her life hadn’t changed. Then the second lightbulb went on: if she started doing self-help instead of simply reading it, then she wouldn’t be unhappy. Far from it – she’d be perfect!

And so Marianne decided to read one self-help book a month for a year and implement everything she learned.

You can learn lessons from facing your fears, but not every fear needs to be confronted.

Marianne’s quest for a perfect life started with the book that transformed her career all those years ago: Feel the Fear, by Susan Jeffers.

As far as Jeffers was concerned, to be happy and successful Marianne had to do the things that scared her. Fear comes up when we’re being pushed out of our comfort zones. And facing that fear is how we move forward in life.

Insecurity and a childhood of extremes were behind Marianne’s money problems.

Some people are terrible with money. They spend it as soon as they get it and can never explain how. They rack up debt and often have to borrow from friends or family.

You probably know someone like this. You might even be cringing because, like Marianne, you tick all the boxes! In her own words, she “threw money away.” Her bank balance was always a mystery to her, unless her card was declined – then she knew she was down to zero.

“The Secret” helped Marianne reconsider her ideal life, but it also disrupted her new financial habits.

After facing the cold reality of her money problems, Marianne picked up a book with a completely different approach.

The Secret, by Rhonda Byrne, teaches that people can use positive thinking and the law of attraction to manifest anything they want in life. Marianne had very strong opinions about this; she thought it was all delusional. But lots of people had told her that the book changed their lives. And a small part of her wanted a magical fix to all her problems.

A family tragedy made Marianne question her entire project, but seeking rejection led to significant wins.

When was the last time you went out looking for rejection? Chances are, it’s never crossed your mind to do this. In fact, you’re probably wondering why anyone would do such a thing.

But, as Marianne learned from the book Rejection Therapy, if you keep facing rejection, you become desensitized to it. You stop seeing it as something to avoid. As a result, you become more willing to try new things.

An Italian retreat inspired profound revelations for Marianne, but it also cost her important relationships.

Having walked away from rejection with a few things to show for it, Marianne was ready to try John Parkin’s flavor of self-help. In his book, F**k It!, Parkin advises people to stop obsessing over things that ultimately don’t matter. The more relaxed they are about life, the easier life becomes.

Since she worried so much, learning to say “fuck it” to everything really appealed to Marianne. She was also excited to go on the author’s week-long retreat in Italy.

Marianne’s high from attending the Tony Robbins seminar was short-lived – and was followed by the harsh reality of being broke.

Marianne may have lost an old friend, but she’d also made new ones who were as enthusiastic about self-help as she was. This is how she came across her next guide on the road to perfection: Tony Robbins.

In his book, Awaken the Giant Within, Robbins teaches that we can have anything we want if we get our minds and bodies in the right state. However, rather than reading the 500 or so pages, Marianne spent around $600 on a seminar led by the man himself.

When self-help started to make her angry and sick, Marianne was inspired to turn her attention away from herself.

It’s hard to keep going once you’ve taken a knock. And after hitting rock bottom financially, Marianne wasn’t sure about continuing her self-help project. But she didn’t think she’d be happy facing the real world, either.

Then, a phone call from her editor pointed a way forward. Marianne was asked to write an article about the growing popularity of angel therapy – the practice of asking guardian angels for help.

Imagining her own funeral caused Marianne’s breakdown – and eventually her breakthrough.

Have you ever imagined how your funeral will go? Maybe you’ve thought about what you’ll be wearing, or how many people will show up. Or, you’ve wondered what people will say about you.

This fairly morbid exercise was a step in Marianne’s bid to become selfless. She was following the advice of The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, by Stephen Covey, who believes that happiness comes from being good to others.

A therapist and a German spiritual teacher helped Marianne understand the root of her struggles with perfection.

How often have you set goals at the beginning of a new year, only to look back after a year and find that you haven’t reached any of them?

It can be discouraging. But many of us dust ourselves off, reassess our goals, and try to figure out how we can do better. Marianne was no different. When she entered the new year without the perfect life she’d set out to create, she consulted a therapist.

An awkward date revealed why Marianne had trouble connecting with others.

When Marianne decided to self-help her way through the dating world, she was surprised to find that she had no problem approaching men. All the fear-facing and rejection therapy had done its work. So, meeting a man would be easy now, right?

Wrong.

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What is Help Me! about?

Help Me! (2018) is a record of one woman’s mission to fix her life through self-help books, from the day she finally said “enough” to the thrilling highs and abysmal lows. These blinks share the money, life, and relationship lessons she uncovered – and how they impacted her.

Best quote from Help Me!

It felt good to become much clearer on what I really did want.

—Marianne Power

Who should read Help Me!?

People interested in personal development
Self-help enthusiasts
Anyone who enjoyed Bridget Jones’s Diary

About the Author

Marianne Power is a journalist and speaker based in London, England. She’s been published in newspapers such as the Daily Telegraph and the Irish Independent and has also written for magazines including Grazia, Bazaar, and Good Housekeeping.

Categories with Help Me!

Personal Development Motivation & Inspiration Biography & Memoir

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