What is the main message of The Comfort Book?

The main message of The Comfort Book is to provide solace, hope, and inspiration in difficult times.

How long does it take to read The Comfort Book?

The reading time for The Comfort Book can vary depending on the reader's speed. However, the Blinkist summary can be read in just 15 minutes.

Who is the author of The Comfort Book?

The author of The Comfort Book is Matt Haig.

Motivation & Inspiration

The Comfort Book Book Summary - The Comfort Book Book explained in key points

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The Comfort Book summary

Name: The Comfort Book
Rating: 4.7 (716 reviews)
Author: Matt Haig

Matt Haig

Hopeful Reflections on the Beauty and Unpredictability of Existence

4.7 (716 ratings)

24 mins

Brief summary

The Comfort Book by Matt Haig is a collection of essays that offer a sense of solace during difficult times. It includes personal anecdotes, quotes, and wisdom that remind us of the beauty and hope in life.

Topics

Self-Care Inspiration Mental Health Men's Health Memoirs Wisdom Meaningful Living

Table of Contents

The Comfort Book
Summary of 15 key ideas

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Key idea 1 of 15

Introduction

Have you ever had the experience of hitting rock bottom? Of feeling so depressed and anxious that you felt like you couldn’t bear to be alive? That’s a feeling that the author Matt Haig knows very well. When he was 24 years old and living in Ibiza for the summer, he had what he describes as a “breakdown.” He was flooded with an anxiety so intense, he couldn’t get out of bed.

From the outside, he looked “normal.” Inside, he was in a constant state of panic and despair. He was so desperate to escape from those feelings that he decided he had to end his life. He went to the top of some cliffs and prepared to jump. But something held him back: he thought about the pain he’d cause his family if he were gone.

In his toughest moments during the years that followed, Haig clung to what he calls “life rafts”: small comforts that gave him a momentary reprieve from his painful thoughts and reminded him of his own resilience. Twenty years, two children, and many books later, these life rafts have carried Haig into a life he loves. Although he would be the first to tell you that there’s no such thing as complete recovery, his life now looks very different from how it did when he was in the grip of his breakdown.

What gave Haig a sense of comfort, even as he felt he was falling apart? What allowed him to keep going through years of severe depression and anxiety?

That’s what you’re about to find out in these blinks.

Whether you’re feeling depressed or just want to develop your emotional resilience, prepare to draw inspiration from Haig’s honest and sometimes unconventional advice. These blinks distill The Comfort Book into 14 key points or mantras, brought to life by an audio soundtrack.

Number one: When you’re lost, just keep walking.

Imagine you’re walking through a dark forest, crashing through the undergrowth. You can’t see where you’re going, and your skin is full of red welts from the mosquitoes swarming around you. Nothing looks familiar anymore. You’re hungry, tired, and just want to get home. But how do you find your way?

There will be times in your life when you’re in that metaphorical forest – when all your carefully laid plans have gone wrong and you’re faced with a wilderness you simply weren’t prepared for. When that happens, just keep walking in a straight line, putting one foot in front of the other. Trust that there is a way out, even if you can’t see it immediately.

Number two: Don’t believe everything your depressed brain tells you.

Sometimes, being depressed can feel like being stuck in the bottom of a valley. You can only see what’s right in front of you, so you’re unaware of the beautiful view that lies just up that hill. Depression whispers in your ear: saying “You will never get better.” And you believe that voice in your head because, in that moment, you can’t imagine ever feeling joy again. But your depressed brain is telling you lies. You will feel better – even if you can’t imagine it now.

Think back to a time when you felt pretty crummy, and it seemed like you’d feel that way forever. Maybe it was when you were a moody teenager. Or perhaps it was when you were an exhausted, sleep-deprived parent of young kids. Have you had moments of joy or pleasure since that time – moments you couldn’t have imagined in the grip of your despair? How you feel today is not necessarily how you’ll feel in a week or a year.

Number three: Embrace imperfection.

You’re allowed to be messy.

You’re allowed to be emotional.

Number four: Borrow faith from someone else.

When your own world is very dark, it can be impossible to feel any faith in yourself and imagine that things will get better. But, luckily, you can borrow faith from other people by learning about their lives.

Next time you’re feeling stuck and hopeless, look up some stories from people who’ve also encountered adversity – and made their way through. People like Maya Angelou, the author and poet who survived an abusive childhood and became one of the world’s most powerful activists and writers.

Number five: Write it all down.

If your leg is broken, a cast and crutches signals to other people that you’ve been through something and are currently going through something. But mental illness is largely invisible. The way you look on the outside doesn’t represent how you feel. Your insides and your outsides don’t match.

Writing can be a bridge between the inner and outer you. It can be a way to put all your feelings into words that other people can understand. Or a way to make sense of what’s going on in your mind.

Number six: Just say no.

Self-care isn’t all bubble baths and candles. Often, it’s about being tough and having firm boundaries. It’s about saying “no”:

No, I don’t want more cake.

Number seven: Get lost in music.

There’s something magical about music. It can transport you into the past, rev you up, or change your mood entirely. Like when you’re in the car, and a song comes on that you can shout along to with the windows down. Or how sad music can allow you to have a good cry and mourn a breakup. Or how another song might remind you of a dear friend.

So put some music on, and allow yourself to get lost in the sounds.

Number eight: Find your own squad of goldsaddle goatfish.

Divers who were swimming in the ocean around Hawaii noticed something strange: a fish they’d never seen before was swimming around. It looked like a small, golden fish they were familiar with called the goldsaddle goatfish. But it was much bigger.

When they swam up to it, the big fish suddenly split into eight little fish. It turns out that goatfish swim together in perfect formation when they’re feeling attacked, so that they appear more threatening to predators.

Number nine: Stand in the rain.

Have you ever tried to make it stop raining? Give it a go! Shout at the sky, and shake your fist.

It doesn’t work, does it? You can shout as much as you like, but it will just keep raining.

Number ten: Seek out wonder and cultivate curiosity.

You want to know what the mortal enemy of anxiety is? Curiosity. That’s because it’s hard to be anxious and curious at the same time. As soon as you start wondering about something – or someone – else, you become anchored to the world instead of stuck in the scary world in your head.

So look around you and practice cultivating curiosity. Eavesdrop on the fight happening at the table next to you. Or google something you’ve always wondered about, like how gravity really works.

Number eleven: Know that you’re already, always enough.

Babies are universally adored. They just exist, stare at us, blink from time to time, and demand food. And we love them for it.

Nobody stares at a baby and thinks to themselves, If only that baby were wealthier, or more popular, it would be a valuable human being. A baby’s value is innate in its raw state. Just like our value is innate. But that’s so hard to remember.

Number twelve: Stare down your demons.

The classic horror movie Jaws is known to keep people on the edge of their seats – and yet we only see the famously terrifying shark 1 hour and 21 minutes into the movie. That’s because, sometimes, what we don’t see or what we’re left to imagine is scarier than what’s actually there.

You probably have your own ominous Jaws soundtrack in your head: your own inner sharks, parts of yourself that scare you or feelings you’d rather ignore.

Number thirteen: Don’t be in the moment.

This might seem like strange advice. We’re always told to be in the moment – to appreciate every second of every day. But that can add a whole lot of unnecessary pressure to our lives. On top of everything else, we have to add “being in the moment” to the list. But think about it. You’re always in the moment. You're alive, aren’t you? Even if the moment is spent scrolling through Instagram, you’re still experiencing it.

When people say we should “be in the moment,” they often mean we should be mindful of the moment we’re in. But, let’s face it, being exquisitely aware of what’s going on in our minds all the time can be awful. In fact, it was when the author was at his most depressed that he felt most in the moment. He was excruciatingly aware of his surroundings, and of what was going on in his brain. He would have given anything to be mindless sometimes.

Number fourteen: Cultivate irrational hope.

Did you know that one of the most hopeful songs was written at one of the most hopeless points in human history? Somewhere Over the Rainbow was composed by two Jewish musicians – Harold Arlen and Yip Harburg – for the movie The Wizard of Oz. The movie came out in 1939, the year Adolf Hitler unleashed a tide of anti-Semitism on the world. The fact that these musicians chose that moment to create one of the most optimistic songs ever written is probably not coincidental.

There’s nothing rational about hope. In the middle of a global pandemic, it can feel extremely irrational to be hopeful. And if you’re struggling with anxiety or depression, hope can be even harder to find.

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What is The Comfort Book about?

The Comfort Book (2021) is a compendium of practices, philosophies, stories, and encouragements to help you get through tough times. Matt Haig shares the insights he gained while experiencing years of severe anxiety and depression, as well as his own unconventional strategies for developing a sense of self-worth and looking after your mental health.

The Comfort Book Review

The Comfort Book (2021) by Matt Haig is a collection of meditations, stories, and reflections that provide solace and inspiration in challenging times. Here's why this book is worth reading:

Full of heartfelt wisdom and comfort, it offers guidance on finding joy and peace in the midst of uncertainty.
The book's wide range of topics, from love and hope to loss and anxiety, speaks to the universal human experience and offers relatable insights.
With its honest and relatable tone, it creates a genuine connection with readers, reminding them that they are not alone in their struggles.

Who should read The Comfort Book?

Fans of Matt Haig’s honest and unconventional approach to discussing mental health
Anyone looking for strategies to build emotional resilience
People grappling with pandemic-related uncertainty

About the Author

Matt Haig is the best-selling author of nonfiction books Reasons to Stay Alive and Notes on a Nervous Planet. His novels for adults include The Midnight Library and The Humans. His children’s book A Boy Called Christmas was adapted into a film.

Categories with The Comfort Book

Motivation & Inspiration Mindfulness & Happiness

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