Powerful ideas from top nonfiction
Try Blinkist to get the key ideas from 7,000+ bestselling nonfiction titles and podcasts. Listen or read in just 15 minutes.
Start your free trial
Blink 3 of 8 - The 5 AM Club
by Robin Sharma
Listen to the Intro
The Five Core Conversations for Couples summary
David Bulitt and Julie Bulitt
Expert Advice about How to Develop: Effective Communication, a Long-Term Financial Plan, Cooperative Parenting Strategies, Mutually Satisfying Sex, and Work-Life Balance
15 mins
Brief summary
The Five Core Conversations for Couples by David Bulitt and Julie Bulitt conveys the vital importance of five key topics in every relationship: money, sex, trust, communication, and vision. It offers practical advice and helpful tips for a healthy and long-lasting partnership.
Table of Contents
The Five Core Conversations for Couples
Summary of 6 key ideas
Audio & text in the Blinkist app
Key idea 1 of 6
Core #1: Building and maintaining the connection
As soon as Sarah and Ron walked into Julie Bulitt's office, she quickly noticed the palpable distance between them. Sarah appeared stiff right next to her husband, and Ron purposely sat down on the farthest chair from his wife. You could just see the stress etched all over their faces.
As it turned out, juggling full-time jobs and two kids meant they had no time for each other. In fact, they hadn't spent quality time alone together for more than a year.
Julie advised them to schedule an activity they could enjoy as a couple, no kids or chores, just the two of them hanging out. It didn't need to be a daily occurrence, but something they could both look forward to regularly. Sarah and Ron took this advice to heart, and when they returned to Julie's office several weeks later, they were holding hands.
That’s one of the core pillars of a healthy and successful relationship: connection. You don’t just stop after forging a bond and committing to the relationship. Just like how a home needs tending to stay tidy, a relationship has to be maintained for it to thrive.
Unfortunately, more often than not, couples forget to put in the effort once they’re all settled down. They no longer work on themselves and the relationship. Then, when their disconnect begins damaging the relationship, they ignore it and hide behind the excuse that they’re too busy. They know it’s a problem, but they keep putting it on the back burner. They only start caring once it’s too late to repair the mess.
To avoid falling into that trap, it's essential to keep in mind that a relationship requires ongoing attention and care. Maintaining a strong connection with your partner is what keeps the relationship alive.
And the best thing about it? It can be done in a variety of ways. There’s not just one way to connect with your partner. You can freely explore what works for you both.
It can be as special as going on weekly dinner dates or as simple as reading the morning news together without distractions. Even supporting your partner’s interests and doing something with your kid can count as connecting, too. It’s also important to talk about what acts of kindness you want your partner to do more, like complimenting you or picking up your dry cleaning.
Maintaining the connection also means learning how to deal with arguments. Remember that arguments lead to disconnect, and that’s the opposite of what you’re aiming for. Whenever you’re mad at your partner, communicate it instead of giving them the silent treatment. Don’t treat them as if they’re a ghost – that will just make things worse.
However, there are situations where it's best to stay silent. If what you'll say won't change anything, it's best to keep it to yourself. For instance, say you're on a road trip and warned your partner not to drink too much water. They went ahead and did it anyway, and now they're begging to stop at the next gas station. You could say, "I told you so," but what's the point? It's not going to make them need to pee any less, so it's probably best to just say nothing – and avoid any unnecessary drama.
Another thing to keep in mind is to avoid pushing your partner's buttons. Be mindful of how you criticize and correct them. And most importantly, when the going gets tough, don't doubt for a second that you and your partner can handle it. If you believe in yourselves, you'll be able to weather any storm.
Want to see all full key ideas from The Five Core Conversations for Couples?
Key ideas in The Five Core Conversations for Couples
More knowledge in less time
Read or listen
Get the key ideas from nonfiction bestsellers in minutes, not hours.
Find your next read
Get book lists curated by experts and personalized recommendations.
Shortcasts New
We’ve teamed up with podcast creators to bring you key insights from podcasts.
What is The Five Core Conversations for Couples about?
The Five Core Conversations for Couples (2020) examines the five important topics every couple should talk about. It offers expert guidance on the core facets of a relationship that can help you strengthen yours.
Who should read The Five Core Conversations for Couples?
- Young couples looking for relationship advice
- Older couples wanting to fix and strengthen their marriage
- Anyone in a relationship
Categories with The Five Core Conversations for Couples
Book summaries like The Five Core Conversations for Couples
People ❤️ Blinkist
Sven O.
It's highly addictive to get core insights on personally relevant topics without repetition or triviality. Added to that the apps ability to suggest kindred interests opens up a foundation of knowledge.
Thi Viet Quynh N.
Great app. Good selection of book summaries you can read or listen to while commuting. Instead of scrolling through your social media news feed, this is a much better way to spend your spare time in my opinion.
Jonathan A.
Life changing. The concept of being able to grasp a book's main point in such a short time truly opens multiple opportunities to grow every area of your life at a faster rate.
Renee D.
Great app. Addicting. Perfect for wait times, morning coffee, evening before bed. Extremely well written, thorough, easy to use.
People also liked these summaries
4.7 Stars
Average ratings on iOS and Google Play
29 Million
Downloads on all platforms
10+ years
Experience igniting personal growth