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Blink 3 of 8 - The 5 AM Club
by Robin Sharma
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Gaslighting summary
Stephanie Moulton Sarkis
Recognize Manipulative and Emotionally Abusive People - and Break Free
18 mins
Brief summary
Gaslighting by Stephanie Moulton Sarkis delves into the manipulative techniques used by gaslighters, equipping readers with the knowledge and strategies to recognize and defend against this toxic behavior.
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Gaslighting
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Key idea 1 of 5
Trapped in deception: Recognizing the gaslighting maze
Imagine you're in a labyrinth, and your trust becomes the tool that pulls you deeper into confusion. This is the world of gaslighting – a crafty and harmful form of manipulation that bends reality and makes you question your very sanity. But by recognizing the common traits of gaslighters, you can pinpoint their deceptive tactics and avoid their manipulation.
Gaslighters are artful at delivering what are called conditional apologies. “I'm sorry you feel that way,” they say, subtly deflecting the blame onto you. They cleverly make it appear as if the issue is with your feelings rather than their actions, leaving you doubting the legitimacy of your emotions.
Additionally, they’re fond of triangulation – a method of indirect communication that breeds confusion and tension. Instead of addressing issues directly, they pass messages through others, keeping themselves in control and others in disarray. In the same vein, gaslighters use splitting to divide and conquer. They pit people against each other, creating distractions that shift attention from their actions and build an illusion of innocence.
Gaslighters are often characterized by their demand for special treatment. They dismiss and undervalue those they perceive as less powerful, expecting preferential treatment in return. Obsessed with personal image and reputation, they tend to dominate interactions, shining the spotlight on superficial matters.
But here's the thing: gaslighters don't respond to traditional discipline or punishment. They consistently dodge responsibility and resort to lying, manipulating, and teasing to wear down your resistance. For them, gaslighting is not a tactical manipulation – it's an integral part of their personality, closely tied to their constant thirst for power.
Living with a gaslighter may have led you to develop cognitive dissonance. This is a state where you're dealing with constant discrepancies between the gaslighter's words and actions, making your reality a confusing tangle of contradictions. This can make you feel compelled to stay in the relationship even though it’s ultimately harming you.
Healthy individuals don't resort to gaslighting. See these behaviors for what they are – the machinations of a manipulator who’s an expert at sowing seeds of self-doubt and distorting reality. Recognizing these patterns is the first step toward breaking free from their grip.
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What is Gaslighting about?
Gaslighting (2018) is an illuminating guide in the obscure world of emotional manipulation. It reveals how to identify and break free from the devastating impact of gaslighting, so you can regain control of your life and restore your sense of self.
Gaslighting Review
Gaslighting (2018) by Stephanie Moulton Sarkis is an essential read for anyone who wants to understand the manipulative tactics used in toxic relationships and learn how to break free. Here's why this book stands out:
- With clear explanations and real-life examples, it empowers readers to recognize gaslighting behavior and regain control of their lives.
- The book offers practical strategies and tools to confront and address gaslighting, providing readers with a path to healing and personal growth.
- Through its compassionate tone and relatable stories, it ensures that readers feel supported and understood in their journey towards healing and self-discovery.
Who should read Gaslighting?
- Emotional abuse victims searching for coping strategies
- Friends and relatives hoping to understand their loved ones' gaslighting experiences
- Mental health professionals seeking deeper insights into gaslighting and its effects
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Gaslighting FAQs
What is the main message of Gaslighting?
The main message of Gaslighting is to raise awareness about manipulation and emotional abuse.
How long does it take to read Gaslighting?
The reading time for Gaslighting varies, but it typically takes several hours. The Blinkist summary can be read in just a few minutes.
Is Gaslighting a good book? Is it worth reading?
Gaslighting is worth reading for its insights and practical advice in navigating manipulative relationships.
Who is the author of Gaslighting?
The author of Gaslighting is Stephanie Moulton Sarkis.
What to read after Gaslighting?
If you're wondering what to read next after Gaslighting, here are some recommendations we suggest:
- You Can Thrive After Narcissistic Abuse by Melanie Tonia Evans
- Emotional Blackmail by Susan Forward with Donna Frazier
- Why Does He Do That? by Lundy Bancroft
- In Sheep’s Clothing by George Simon Jr.
- Phishing for Phools by George A. Akerlof and Robert J. Shiller
- Rethinking Narcissism by Craig Malkin
- Should I Stay Or Should I Go by Ramani Durvasula
- Electra by Sophocles
- Make Your Bed by William H. McRaven
- Building Your Money Machine with ChatGPT by Larry Wheeler