Who is the author of Didn't See It Coming?

The author of Didn't See It Coming is Carey Nieuwhof.

Motivation & Inspiration

Didn't See It Coming Book Summary - Didn't See It Coming Book explained in key points

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Didn't See It Coming summary

Name: Didn't See It Coming
Rating: 4.3 (110 reviews)
Author: Carey Nieuwhof

Carey Nieuwhof

Overcoming the Seven Greatest Challenges That No One Expects and Everyone Experiences

4.3 (110 ratings)

23 mins

Brief summary

Didn't See It Coming by Carey Nieuwhof is a leadership book that highlights 7 challenges leaders experience on their way to success. It provides practical advice to overcome those challenges and avoid burnout, as well as guidance on staying relevant and fulfilled in your career.

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Christianity Love

Table of Contents

Didn't See It Coming
Summary of 7 key ideas

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Key idea 1 of 7

What’s in it for me? A reverent, respectful look at how to overcome life’s most challenging problems.

Life comes at you fast, huh? One minute, you’re a fresh graduate, eager to change the world with your big ideas and inspiration. The next, you’re a middle-aged cynic, self-medicating your way through regret, disappointment, and depression.

No one is immune: whether you’re a high-flying executive or a hardworking barista, sooner or later, you’ll encounter one of the seven great challenges in life: cynicism, compromise, disconnection, irrelevance, pride, burnout, and emptiness.

The good news is, you can learn to recognize the signs of these impending challenges and take steps to mitigate their impact. These blinks guide you through the seven great obstacles and show how you can use Jesus’s teachings as a roadmap to navigate them.

In these blinks, you’ll learn

concrete steps to nip cynicism in the bud;
why character is more important than competence for lasting happiness; and
why simply putting away our devices won’t necessarily make us more present to our family and friends.

You don’t become cynical because you don’t care, but because you do.

The author Pastor Carey Nieuwhof is, in a word, an idealist. This might not surprise you: after all, to become so popular in the Christian community, it helps to see the best in the world. But that hasn’t always been the case. Early in his career as a pastor, the author encountered the first of our seven great challenges in life: cynicism. He had to work through it to become the jovial optimist he is today.

When he first became a minister, Carey found work in a rural community in Ontario. He preached at three churches, the largest of which had an average attendance of 23 people. He wanted to grow his congregation, so he made sure the people who did show up felt special and well looked after.

Carey cared about everyone who came to his church. But this caring broke his heart.

The key message here is: You don’t become cynical because you don’t care, but because you do.

When Roger and Mary first showed up to Carey’s church, he could tell they needed special help. They were emotionally needy and destitute and sometimes couldn’t get to church because their car frequently broke down. Carey made sure they had gas money and drove across town whenever they needed spiritual or emotional guidance.

One day, Roger announced that they would stop coming to his church. The reason? Carey hadn’t done enough for them.

Roger’s accusation shook Carey deeply. In the weeks that followed, he noticed that he had stopped caring and trusting people.

He knew he couldn’t continue like this. But what should he do?

Carey remembered that God sent Jesus to counter inevitable human cynicism. Jesus confronted despair and made sure it wouldn’t win. Carey realized that as long as Jesus was in his life, he didn’t need to fear that his past would become his future.

Letting Jesus into your life takes years. Luckily, we can take concrete actions right now to counter encroaching cynicism. First, schedule unstructured time for thinking and wondering. Staying open to possibilities that are new and different to scenarios you’ve already experienced can lead to unexpected joy. Second, ask open-ended questions, like “why?” and “why not?” and listen – really listen – to what people have to say. They might surprise you.

But the most important thing of all? Remaining curious. Curious people are never cynical, and cynical people are never curious.

Uncompromised character, not competence, determines how far you get in life.

Chances are, you know people who’ve changed over the years. You might have friends who used to have tons of energy but now spend all their time in front of the TV. Or worse, you might know people who made wedding vows but find themselves flirting – or more – a few years into their marriage.

What if all your friends are bastions of self-control and good moral judgment? You only need to take a look at the highest levels of politics, entertainment, sports, and religious leadership. You’re sure to see people there who have fallen from grace, having abandoned values they claimed to hold dear.

Technology doesn’t create disconnection. It just amplifies what’s already there.

Not-so-breaking news: we’re more isolated than ever. Our phones, tablets, computers, cars, refrigerators, and the rest are all close enough to sentience to interfere in our relationships with those nearest and dearest to us.

What’s more, social media has morphed us all into obsessive narcissists. A well-known study from the 1950s asked teenagers whether they thought they were “very important.” Less than 10 percent said yes. The very same study conducted in the 2000s revealed that more than 80 percent of teens agreed that they were “very important.” With so many of us thinking that we’re God’s gift to humanity, it can be hard to give others the patience and attention they deserve.

Embracing change and fighting irrelevance helps deepen your impact.

Meet Aunt Helen. Aunt Helen’s house seems to be stuck in a previous decade. From her shag carpeting to her waterbed and orange egg chair, it’s clear that she’s stopped evolving her style.

Aunt Helen knows what she likes, and she doesn’t feel the need to bother with avocado toast or succulents or whatever the kids are into these days. Even if her style comes back into fashion, she won’t even know that her egg chair is now worth a fortune on eBay.

Pride is incredibly damaging but can be mitigated by cultivating humility.

Remember that study of narcissistic teens who classified themselves as “very important”? It’s easy to see that they suffer from pride – number five of our seven great challenges. But in fact, most of us suffer from pride, on some level at least. And that includes you.

At its heart, pride is the preoccupation with one’s self over all else. Pride is nurtured by insecurity. Prideful people are constantly comparing themselves to others, measuring how they stack up. They measure their self-worth according to their most recent success or failure. Perhaps worst of all, prideful people can’t take pleasure in someone else’s success. The victory of a peer, or even sometimes a loved one, means their loss.

Recovering from burnout requires patience and outside help.

When the author was 40 years old, he gave the keynote address at North Point Church, founded by one of his mentors in Alpharetta, Georgia. He was over the moon when his mentor and family told him his speech was a “grand-slam home run.”

In our society, workaholics are rewarded, and it was no different for Carey. He’d worked incredibly hard to prepare, and it was the pinnacle of his career to date. But what came next wasn’t an afterglow of happiness. In fact, it was the worst few months of his life. His productivity tanked, and he slipped into a deep depression. He even contemplated suicide.

More stuff won’t cure a feeling of emptiness. But finding a mission you care about will.

As Carey is the author of several popular books, it’s not a shock to learn that he loves writing. For many years he has kept a blog that keeps him pretty happy most days.

One day in 2015, one of his blog posts attracted half a million viewers in its first 24 hours. He was completely elated. Until he wasn’t. The feeling didn’t last very long. Shortly after, Carey received a visit from our seventh and final great challenge in life: emptiness.

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What is Didn't See It Coming about?

Didn’t See It Coming (2018) offers guidance on how to overcome seven important challenges that you will inevitably face in life. Drawing on Pastor Carey Nieuwhof’s own personal struggles and victories, these blinks show how faith and foresight can help you work through the challenges of work, family, and friendships.

Didn't See It Coming Review

Didn't See It Coming by Carey Nieuwhof (2018) is an eye-opening book that explores the seven challenges every leader must confront to avoid potential pitfalls and thrive in their personal and professional lives. Here's why this book is worth reading:

Insightful and thought-provoking, it provides practical strategies to identify and overcome blind spots that can hinder personal growth and success.
Backed by extensive research and real-life examples, the book offers actionable advice that can be applied in various leadership scenarios.
Using relatable stories and personal anecdotes, Nieuwhof's writing style captivates readers and ensures that the book is far from boring.

Who should read Didn't See It Coming?

Christians who feels stuck without a clear path forward
People contemplating a career change
Those curious about the relevance of Christianity to our modern times

About the Author

Just after passing the bar exam, Carey Nieuwhof left a budding law career to go to a seminary. From there, he went on to found one of the most influential churches in North America, the Connexus Church in Barrie, Ontario. He is the author of several books and the host of a popular podcast on leadership. Didn’t See It Coming has spent months at number one on Amazon’s Christian Leadership best-seller list.

Categories with Didn't See It Coming

Motivation & Inspiration Personal Development Religion & Spirituality

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