How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less Book Summary - How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less Book explained in key points
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How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less summary

Nicholas Boothman

Make Instant, Meaningful Connections for Interviewing, Selling, Managing, Pitching

4.2 (1436 ratings)
31 mins

Brief summary

How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less by Nicholas Boothman is a self-help book that teaches techniques to quickly develop connections with people through body language, tone of voice, and conversation skills. It offers practical tips for building relationships with anyone in any situation.

Table of Contents

    How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less
    Summary of 7 key ideas

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    Key idea 1 of 7

    Bonding with others will make you healthier and more successful.

    The African plains, tens of thousands of years ago. Darkness falls, and a small group of early humans gathers around a crackling fire. They've spent the day hunting together, tracking prey across the grasslands, coordinating their movements with gestures and grunts. Now they share the spoils, tearing into roasted meat, their bodies close, their survival intertwined. Alone, any one of them would have starved. Together, they feast.

    That scene, repeated across millennia, didn't just keep our ancestors alive – it wired something fundamental into our DNA. We're built to bond.

    Fast forward to today. Cocktail parties instead of campfires. Town-hall meetings rather than tribal gatherings. Star Trek conventions in place of ritual ceremonies. The settings have changed, but the drive remains unchanged. We seek each other out. We cluster. We connect. It's not just culture or habit – it's universal human architecture.

    Yet here's what's fascinating: this deep-seated need to bond isn't just about feeling good or avoiding loneliness. It's about staying alive.

    Dr. Lisa Berkman from the Harvard School of Health Sciences tracked 7,000 people over nine years, watching how their social connections shaped their fates. The data revealed something stark: those who lacked quality social or community ties were three times more likely to die of a medical illness than those with strong social networks. Three times. Your relationships aren't just enriching your life – they're literally extending it. And there's more at stake than longevity.

    Think about the last great opportunity that came your way. Maybe a job opening you heard about before it was publicly posted. Perhaps a blind date set up by a friend that actually worked out. Or that impossible-to-get concert ticket that an acquaintance happened to be selling. Behind each of these lucky breaks sits a network – people who knew people, who thought of you at the right moment.

    Whatever you're chasing – whether it's career advancement, romantic connection, or simply experiences that light you up – your chances skyrocket when you've cultivated a wide web of relationships. Success doesn't happen in isolation. It happens at the intersections between people.

    Which brings us to the uncomfortable truth: knowing that bonding matters doesn't necessarily make it easy. 

    Connecting with strangers, especially those who don't share obvious common ground, can feel awkward and forced. And the stakes are high. Research suggests you have roughly 90 seconds when meeting someone new to spark their interest. Miss that window, and you've likely missed your chance entirely.

    Ninety seconds. That's it.

    Daunting? Absolutely. Impossible? Not even close. In the chapters ahead, we'll walk you through the specific skills and techniques that make meaningful connection possible – even in those fleeting first moments.

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    What is How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less about?

    How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less (2000) is a guide to connecting, communicating and expanding your social world. These blinks will teach you how to strike up a conversation with strangers and make them like you. It’ll also show you how to decode even their most subtle gestures.

    Being likable is an art you can ace.

    How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less Review

    How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less (2000) is a book that provides practical techniques for building instant rapport and making a positive first impression. Here's why this book is worth reading:

    • Full of useful strategies and techniques, it offers readers effective ways to connect with others and build lasting relationships.
    • By combining real-life examples and practical exercises, the book provides a hands-on approach that helps readers apply the principles in their everyday lives.
    • With its engaging anecdotes and insightful advice, the book keeps readers entertained and motivated, ensuring it is far from boring.

    Best quote from How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less

    All relationships are built on trust. Trust is built on congruence.

    —Nicholas Boothman
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    Who should read How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less?

    • Salespeople who want to improve their interpersonal skills
    • Anyone who wants to meet new people but doesn’t know where to begin
    • People looking to expand their circle of friends

    About the Author

    Nicholas Boothman is a former fashion and advertising photographer who has spent the last two decades studying how people connect and communicate. He is an expert in neuro-linguistic programming.

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    How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less FAQs 

    What is the main message of How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less?

    The main message of How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less is that you can establish rapport quickly by using effective communication skills.

    How long does it take to read How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less?

    Estimate reading time: several hours. Blinkist Summary: 15 minutes.

    Is How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less a good book? Is it worth reading?

    This book is worth reading for its practical tips and techniques that can improve your interpersonal skills.

    Who is the author of How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less?

    Nicholas Boothman is the author of How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less.

    What to read after How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less?

    If you're wondering what to read next after How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less, here are some recommendations we suggest:
    • The 11 Laws of Likability by Michelle Tillis Lederman
    • How to Become a People Magnet by Marc Reklau
    • The Fine Art Of Small Talk by Debra Fine
    • The Art of Seduction by Robert Greene
    • Super Human by Dave Asprey
    • How to Talk to Anyone by Leil Lowndes
    • The Charisma Myth by Olivia Fox Cabane
    • Nothing Changes Until You Do by Mike Robbins
    • My Morning Routine by Benjamin Spall and Michael Xander
    • The Presentation of Self in Everyday Life by Erving Goffman