Drama Free Book Summary - Drama Free Book explained in key points
Listen to the Intro

Drama Free summary

Nedra Glover Tawwab

A Guide to Managing Unhealthy Family Relationships

4.4 (54 ratings)
17 mins
Table of Contents

    Drama Free
    Summary of 6 key ideas

    Audio & text in the Blinkist app
    Key idea 1 of 6

    You can’t make somebody else change.

    Meet Kelly and her troublesome brother, Jeff. Jeff has always been an entitled and manipulative bully, cruel with his words. Their other two siblings have already cut Jeff out of their lives, but Kelly can't. They were always close, and the thought of ending their relationship fills her with guilt.

    If you’ve ever had to suffer through a family member's difficult or abusive behavior, then you may relate to Kelly’s struggle. You tell yourself you’re being patient or growing – that it’s just something you have to “deal with.” But it’s more likely you’re trying to tolerate the intolerable, which builds resentment, not patience. Something has to change.

    Now, here’s a theme that will come up throughout this Blink, because it is absolutely, unequivocally true. You can’t, in any meaningful way, make somebody else change.

    With that in mind, you have two options: you can persevere, or you can change yourself. If you’re reading this Blink, then you’ve probably been persevering for too long. So let’s look at how to change.

    Changing a long-standing pattern of behavior isn’t simple, so we’ll break it down into five basic stages.

    First, there’s precontemplation. Here, you’re not even aware of the problem; you make excuses or unconsciously hide any evidence of it.

    After that is the contemplation stage. This is where Kelly is with her brother. It’s when you start to consider the value of changing. This often comes with guilt, which is completely normal. This is the most common time to enter therapy and talk through the problems.

    Next is preparation. You’ll start experimenting with small changes – testing the water to see what’s possible. Kelly might tell her brother that what he said wasn’t OK. It doesn’t have to be consistent or successful, but you’re getting ready for the next stage: action.

    In this phase, you accept the responsibility of changing and start doing what’s necessary. We’ll look at some more specific actions later – but basically, you’ll no longer adopt the attitude of a victim. You’ll need support during this time to process your feelings and stick to your decisions as you enter the final stage: maintenance.

    This stage is ongoing. You repeat your new actions until they’re habits – and resist the temptation to slide back to how things were.

    No matter what stage you’re at, remember one thing: you’re an adult, and you get to decide who you are as a person. So ask yourself now, who do you want to be? Think about a dysfunctional relationship you have with a family member, and make some notes about what stage of change you’re at.

    Because that’s how change starts.

    Want to see all full key ideas from Drama Free?

    Key ideas in Drama Free

    More knowledge in less time
    Read or listen
    Read or listen
    Get the key ideas from nonfiction bestsellers in minutes, not hours.
    Find your next read
    Find your next read
    Get book lists curated by experts and personalized recommendations.
    Shortcasts New
    We’ve teamed up with podcast creators to bring you key insights from podcasts.

    What is Drama Free about?

    Drama Free (2023) is a concise and thoughtful guide to navigating the negatives of one of the most fundamental and unavoidable aspects of our lives: family. Covering a wide range of topics including emotionally absent parents, codependent siblings, substance abuse, and many more, it offers advice on recognizing the patterns of a dysfunctional family, healing from the past, and growing into the full human being you deserve to be.

    Who should read Drama Free?

    • Adult children or siblings looking to untangle their current family relationships
    • Emotionally troubled individuals who are prepared to analyze their childhood
    • Anyone who tenses up when a family member calls

    About the Author

    Nedra Glover Tawwab is a therapist and relationship expert who specializes in helping people become themselves by establishing healthy boundaries. Her previous book, Set Boundaries, Find Peace, was a New York Times best seller.

    Categories with Drama Free

    Books like Drama Free

    People ❤️ Blinkist
    Sven O.

    It's highly addictive to get core insights on personally relevant topics without repetition or triviality. Added to that the apps ability to suggest kindred interests opens up a foundation of knowledge.

    Thi Viet Quynh N.

    Great app. Good selection of book summaries you can read or listen to while commuting. Instead of scrolling through your social media news feed, this is a much better way to spend your spare time in my opinion.

    Jonathan A.

    Life changing. The concept of being able to grasp a book's main point in such a short time truly opens multiple opportunities to grow every area of your life at a faster rate.

    Renee D.

    Great app. Addicting. Perfect for wait times, morning coffee, evening before bed. Extremely well written, thorough, easy to use.

    People also liked

    Start growing with Blinkist now
    27 Million
    Downloads on all platforms
    4.7 Stars
    Average ratings on iOS and Google Play
    Of Blinkist members create a better reading habit*
    *Based on survey data from Blinkist customers
    Powerful ideas from top nonfiction

    Try Blinkist to get the key ideas from 7,000+ bestselling nonfiction titles and podcasts. Listen or read in just 15 minutes.

    Start your free trial