Powerful ideas from top nonfiction
Try Blinkist to get the key ideas from 7,500+ bestselling nonfiction titles and podcasts. Listen or read in just 15 minutes.
Start your free trial
Blink 3 of 8 - The 5 AM Club
by Robin Sharma
Listen to the Intro
How Not To Be a Boy summary
Robert Webb
A comedian's journey with masculinity and gender
19 mins
Brief summary
How Not To Be a Boy by Robert Webb is a memoir that explores the societal expectations surrounding masculinity and the negative impact they have on men. Webb reflects on his own experiences and provides insight into the toxic nature of traditional gender roles.
Table of Contents
How Not To Be a Boy
Summary of 8 key ideas
Audio & text in the Blinkist app
Key idea 1 of 8
Most behavioral gender differences aren’t biological; they’re shaped by social expectations.
No one sets out to be a bad parent, but some of them can be appallingly stubborn in how they reinforce gender stereotypes. It’s common for a parent to say, “Oh, Sally is such a girl. One day, a boy tried to get her to play with an action figure, and she just put a dress on it and tucked it into bed!”
What many parents don’t understand is that a child may adopt certain stereotypical behaviors, but that this doesn’t mean they’re biologically determined to behave this way.
Whether parents want to admit it or not, most cognitive and behavioral traits are not biological or gender-related at all. In fact, there’s no such thing as a “male brain” or a “female brain.” In November of 2015, an article in Science magazine explained how neuroscientists determined that all brains are unique, and therefore can’t be categorized by gender.
So, if a boy doesn’t want to wear a pink sweater, this isn´t because of biology. Chances are, any recognizable gender differences are the result of social expectations.
In her book Delusions of Gender, psychologist Cordelia Fine points to a study from 2000 that shows just how biased society is about gender. In the study, mothers were asked to examine a sloped walkway that had an adjustable level for how steep it could be. Their task was to judge the steepness and try to determine whether their eleven-month-old toddler could succeed in climbing it.
The results showed that mothers consistently underestimated the girls’ ability to successfully climb slopes that were quite steep. Conversely, the mothers routinely overestimated the ability of the boys, expecting them to be able to climb slopes that often proved to be too steep.
With gender biases like these in society, is it any wonder that men and women will grow up to have different personalities?
Want to see all full key ideas from How Not To Be a Boy?
Key ideas in How Not To Be a Boy
More knowledge in less time
Read or listen
Get the key ideas from nonfiction bestsellers in minutes, not hours.
Find your next read
Get book lists curated by experts and personalized recommendations.
Shortcasts New
We’ve teamed up with podcast creators to bring you key insights from podcasts.
What is How Not To Be a Boy about?
How Not To Be a Boy (2017) is writer and actor Robert Webb’s personal account of what it was like to grow up as a boy in rural England. In particular, what it was like to be the kind of boy who wasn’t all that into typically “manly” stuff. Webb’s tale is both a heartfelt autobiography and a humorously critical assessment of the pressures society can put on young men.
How Not To Be a Boy Review
How Not To Be a Boy (2017) by Robert Webb is a thought-provoking exploration of traditional masculinity and its impact on individuals. Here's why this book is worth a read:
- With honest, personal stories and reflections, it offers a fresh perspective on gender roles and the expectations placed on men.
- By challenging societal norms and questioning traditional masculinity, the book encourages readers to examine and redefine their own identities.
- Webb's humor and wit infuse the book, making it an enjoyable and engaging read while tackling serious and important topics.
Best quote from How Not To Be a Boy
The thing about football – the important thing about football – is that it is not just about football. - Terry Pratchett
—Robert Webb
Who should read How Not To Be a Boy?
- Readers who love a funny story
- People opposed to gender stereotypes
- Fans of Robert Webb and Peep Show
Categories with How Not To Be a Boy
Book summaries like How Not To Be a Boy
People ❤️ Blinkist
Sven O.
It's highly addictive to get core insights on personally relevant topics without repetition or triviality. Added to that the apps ability to suggest kindred interests opens up a foundation of knowledge.
Thi Viet Quynh N.
Great app. Good selection of book summaries you can read or listen to while commuting. Instead of scrolling through your social media news feed, this is a much better way to spend your spare time in my opinion.
Jonathan A.
Life changing. The concept of being able to grasp a book's main point in such a short time truly opens multiple opportunities to grow every area of your life at a faster rate.
Renee D.
Great app. Addicting. Perfect for wait times, morning coffee, evening before bed. Extremely well written, thorough, easy to use.
People also liked these summaries
4.7 Stars
Average ratings on iOS and Google Play
33 Million
Downloads on all platforms
10+ years
Experience igniting personal growth
How Not To Be a Boy FAQs
What is the main message of How Not To Be a Boy?
To challenge gender stereotypes and explore the pressures boys face in society.
How long does it take to read How Not To Be a Boy?
The reading time for How Not To Be a Boy varies, but it can be finished in a few hours. The Blinkist summary can be read in just 15 minutes.
Is How Not To Be a Boy a good book? Is it worth reading?
How Not To Be a Boy is worth reading as it provides a thought-provoking and insightful exploration of masculinity.
Who is the author of How Not To Be a Boy?
Robert Webb is the author of How Not To Be a Boy.
What to read after How Not To Be a Boy?
If you're wondering what to read next after How Not To Be a Boy, here are some recommendations we suggest:
- Raising Cain by Dan Kindlon and Michael Thompson
- Asking for It by Kate Harding
- Boys & Sex by Peggy Orenstein
- Man Enough by Justin Baldoni
- Raising Men by Eric Davis
- Get Better at Anything by Scott H. Young
- The Witches Are Coming by Lindy West
- Feel-Good Productivity by Ali Abdaal
- Mind Magic by James R. Doty
- Tapping by Donna Eden