Powerful ideas from top nonfiction
Try Blinkist to get the key ideas from 5,500+ bestselling nonfiction titles and podcasts. Listen or read in just 15 minutes.
Start your free trial
Blink 3 of 8 - The 5 AM Club
by Robin Sharma
Listen to the Intro
Conscious Uncoupling summary
Katherine Woodward Thomas
5 Steps to Living Happily Even After
23 mins
Table of Contents
Conscious Uncoupling
summarized in 8 key ideas
Audio & text in the Blinkist app
Key idea 1 of 8
You need to stop playing the shame game.
Society is wedded to the idea that coupledom equals success. Coupledom means financial security, social cachet, loved-up Instagram posts, and an end to nosy relatives asking why you haven’t paired off. What’s not to love?
Well, if coupledom equals success, separation equals failure. And, while breakups are hard, the stigma surrounding separations is often just as hard to bear. Or harder.
The key message here is: You need to stop playing the shame game.
Losing love is tough enough. With the added social shame that's often piled on separated couples, the pain can feel unbearable.
Imagine there was no social stigma associated with separation. Imagine you could leave a flawed relationship without experiencing the shame that many of us feel when we fail at “till death do us part”?
Here’s the thing: “till death do us part,” nice as it sounds, isn’t a realistic goal for many contemporary couples.
Sure, traditionally, marriage is forever.
But we’ve abandoned many matrimonial traditions that have ceased to serve us. It’s no longer legal to force an Indian widow to throw herself onto her husband’s funeral pyre. And Chinese brides aren’t required to have their feet bound so they can’t run away from their husbands.
One tradition we haven’t kicked, though, is the conventional promise between bride and groom to stay together “till death do us part.” English-speaking couples have been making that fairly extreme promise to each other since the fourteenth century.
Let’s break that promise down. In the fourteenth century, the average life expectancy was closer to 40 than 80 years. And marriage was considered an economic proposition more than an expression of romantic love.
It’s no coincidence that fairy tales endorsing a “happily ever after” were first told around that same time. “Happily ever after” is easier to achieve when “happily” describes security rather than romance, and when “ever after” might amount to little more than a decade or two.
Our society may view separation as a source of shame, but it shouldn’t. And neither should you. The real shame lies in clinging to an outdated ideal of coupledom that prevents you, and your partner, from living a meaningful, joy-filled life.
Want to see all full key ideas from Conscious Uncoupling?
Key ideas in Conscious Uncoupling
More knowledge in less time
Read or listen
Get the key ideas from nonfiction bestsellers in minutes, not hours.
Find your next read
Get book lists curated by experts and personalized recommendations.
Shortcasts New
We’ve teamed up with podcast creators to bring you key insights from podcasts.
What is Conscious Uncoupling about?
Conscious Uncoupling (2015) is a guide to moving gracefully beyond a dysfunctional relationship and into the next phase of life. It offers a mindful method for navigating separation in five simple steps.
Who should read Conscious Uncoupling?
- Freshly single folks feeling all the raw emotion of a recent breakup
- Couples teetering on the edge of a failing relationship
- Anyone who just can’t stop thinking about the one who got away
Categories with Conscious Uncoupling
Books like Conscious Uncoupling
People ❤️ Blinkist
Sven O.
It's highly addictive to get core insights on personally relevant topics without repetition or triviality. Added to that the apps ability to suggest kindred interests opens up a foundation of knowledge.
Thi Viet Quynh N.
Great app. Good selection of book summaries you can read or listen to while commuting. Instead of scrolling through your social media news feed, this is a much better way to spend your spare time in my opinion.
Jonathan A.
Life changing. The concept of being able to grasp a book's main point in such a short time truly opens multiple opportunities to grow every area of your life at a faster rate.
Renee D.
Great app. Addicting. Perfect for wait times, morning coffee, evening before bed. Extremely well written, thorough, easy to use.
People also liked
Start growing with Blinkist now
26 Million
Downloads on all platforms
4.7 Stars
Average ratings on iOS and Google Play
91%
Of Blinkist members create a better reading habit*
*Based on survey data from Blinkist customers