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Blink 3 of 8 - The 5 AM Club
by Robin Sharma
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Managing Up summary
Mary Abbajay
How to Move up, Win at Work, and Succeed with Any Type of Boss
20 mins
Brief summary
'Managing Up' by Mary Abbajay is a practical guide to building strong, productive relationships with your boss. It offers tips for effective communication, self-advocacy, and achieving professional success by working collaboratively with your manager.
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Managing Up
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Key idea 1 of 7
Introverted and extroverted bosses require different communication styles.
When you want to build interpersonal relationships with people, including your boss, it’s important to understand what makes them tick. How do they tend to communicate and where do they get their energy from?
These aspects of personality are usually determined by a person’s level of extraversion, so ask yourself: Is your boss an Outie – that is, an extrovert? Or is she an Innie, or introvert?
To answer this, look at how your boss behaves.
An Innie boss will often focus on her own thoughts and ideas. This means that she may not share much information with you and might only give you her opinion when you ask for it. This sort of boss doesn’t interact much with her colleagues and tends to reflect on decisions before making them, meaning that she’s slow to respond to people’s queries.
In contrast, a typical Outie boss focuses on the external world of people and her relationships with them. She’ll happily share her knowledge with you; in fact, she may even give you too much information sometimes. You’ll usually know what she’s thinking because she’ll readily tell you, and her friendly attitude will shine through during her regular interactions with staff.
There’s nothing wrong with either Innies or Outies, whether you’re a boss or a subordinate. However, problems can arise when there’s a mismatch between your level of extroversion and your boss’s. Luckily, there are tried and tested strategies for managing up an introverted boss.
For example, if you’re an Outie working for an Innie, you may want more interaction and advice than she tends to give. In this situation, try being proactive. Arrange some one-on-one time with her, and make it your mission to initiate meetings instead of waiting for her to do so. When you do get that precious time with your Innie boss, try not to be too chatty; you’ll get a better response if you keep your interactions tightly focused on the task at hand.
In contrast, if you’re a stressed Innie who feels drained by your Outie boss’s constant communication, there are also ways to manage up. First of all, extroverts need to feel that they’re being heard, so listening, nodding and showing interest while he speaks at length can be a positive step. Second, get comfortable with offering your opinion, even if you have doubts about what you’re saying. Extroverts don’t mind if you think out loud, and they welcome open communication.
At the end of the day, your approach to communication is the key to managing up both Innies and Outies, along with two other personality types, which we’ll look at in the next blink.
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What is Managing Up about?
Managing Up (2018) explores ways to improve your relationship with your boss. Featuring effective strategies for coping with any type of manager, it explains how you can deal with difficult leaders and how to turn a bad boss into a great opportunity for professional growth.
Best quote from Managing Up
Give your micromanager time to get used to you and trust you before you start pushing for change or autonomy.
—Mary Abbajay
Who should read Managing Up?
- Employees working for a horrible boss
- Corporate go-getters looking for fresh insights
- First-time managers seeking a different perspective
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