Name: How to Say Anything to Anyone
Rating: 3.7 (22 reviews)
Author: Shari Harley

How to Say Anything to Anyone summary

Shari Harley

A Guide to Building Business Relationships that Really Work

3.7 (22 ratings)

16 mins

Brief summary

How to Say Anything to Anyone equips us with communication tools to foster open, honest interactions in professional and personal settings. Shari Harley offers strategies for delivering difficult messages and building trust with transparency.

Table of Contents

What’s in it for me? Create better business relationships

Has this ever happened to you? Someone at work is getting on your nerves – maybe they have an annoying habit, like constantly clicking their pen. But for some reason, you just can’t bring yourself to say anything.

Or perhaps you’re a manager, and you have an employee whose performance isn’t up to scratch. But when it comes to giving feedback, you don’t know where to begin.

Many of us experience these frustrating moments, yet we avoid the tough conversations that could resolve them. Why? Often, it’s because we don’t know how to address uncomfortable topics without creating tension.

Shari Harley is a business communication expert. In How to Say Anything to Anyone, she offers a practical guide to navigating these sticky situations with candor and kindness.

If you’re hoping to improve your working relationships, here you’ll find the strategies you need. Through more open, honest communication, you can make your workplace a little less awkward, and a lot more collaborative.

By the end of this Blink, you’ll know how to say anything to anyone. And we mean anything....

The importance of candor

Imagine this. A friend suddenly stops talking to you, with no explanation. Or you have an amazing date, but you never hear from them again.

Of course you want to know why. But do you ask?

The truth is, most of us are wimps. We find it difficult to speak up, or to ask for clarity, so we stay quiet. Instead of finding out what went wrong, we’re left guessing, making assumptions about the situation.

It’s the same thing in the workplace. Let’s say you have a performance appraisal after what you thought was a great year. If you find out that your boss has a very different opinion, it’ll probably come as a shock.

These situations are so common, yet they’re completely avoidable.

So let’s be candid with each other for a change. Let’s communicate openly, honestly, and directly.

Essentially, humans are “why” machines. We want to understand how and why things happen.

And in the absence of information, we make assumptions. For example: “My boss just doesn’t like me. I don’t have a future at this company.”

Maybe you’re right. Maybe you’re wrong. But unless you talk about it, you’ll never know the truth.

Think of it this way – knowledge is power. When you know what people really think, you have choices. You’re more in charge of your career.

Shari Harley is a communication expert who specializes in improving working relationships. According to Harley, to a great extent, our career satisfaction depends on the quality of our relationships.

For that reason, we should make a conscious effort to improve communication with everyone we work with – whether that’s our boss, our coworkers, our employees, or our clients.

Better communication means – you guessed it – more candor.

Here’s an example. Let’s say someone is texting on their phone during a meeting. It’s getting on everyone’s nerves, but no one speaks up.

After all, there’s no official rule about phone use during meetings. Nothing’s been said. So how do you start that conversation now?

These situations are tricky. If someone is being held to a standard they’re unaware of, and then they get called out, they might feel upset or resentful.

But there’s an easy way to avoid these kinds of situations – make an agreement beforehand.

Inevitably, in any working relationship, problems and challenges arise. So take a preventive approach, and communicate your expectations in advance.

How to communicate expectations

If you need further convincing, here’s an example of what happens when you don’t communicate expectations.

Lisa is an HR recruiter. She’s searching for a candidate on behalf of Carol, a hiring manager. Lisa doesn’t get much information from Carol, so she finds candidates who aren’t suitable for the position.

Ask, don’t guess

When she was in her twenties, Harley learned a lesson the hard way. She’d been offered a new position by her employer, a job in training and development, which required her to relocate from Denver to Fort Collins, Colorado.

So she moved to Fort Collins and started work. About four weeks later, she got a call from her boss in Denver.

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