The Art of Happiness Book Summary - The Art of Happiness Book explained in key points

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The Art of Happiness summary

Name: The Art of Happiness
Rating: 4.6 (414 reviews)
Author: Dalai Lama

Dalai Lama

A Handbook for Living

4.6 (414 ratings)

18 mins

Topics

Happiness

Table of Contents

The Art of Happiness
Summary of 9 key ideas

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Key idea 1 of 9

External circumstances cannot create lasting happiness – the right state of mind can.

How can we achieve lasting happiness?

Most people would readily agree that the purpose of life is to seek happiness. Yet for some reason we often see happiness itself as something mysterious and hard to define, and we have a poor understanding of what makes us happy. According to the Dalai Lama, by training one’s mind it is possible to learn how to be happier.

External events can affect a person’s happiness in the short-term, but our level of happiness tends to revert back to a certain baseline soon after the event. For example, winning the lottery only produces a short-lived happiness “high,” which usually subsides relatively quickly. Similarly, people who face sudden and tragic health problems like a diagnosis of cancer or paralysis typically – after a period of grieving – recover their previous level of happiness. Hence, it seems no specific external conditions can really affect our happiness in the long run.

But the mind is a powerful tool; our mental state greatly affects how we perceive the world. Consider, for example, how negative emotions skew our view of other people: when we’re angry, even dear friends can seem annoying, cold and hostile.

According to the Dalai Lama, it is possible to systematically train your mind so that you identify and cultivate positive mental states while eliminating the negative ones. Though this is a slow, gradual process, it eventually brings a calmness that allows you to live a happy, joyous life no matter what the external situation.

External circumstances cannot create lasting happiness – the right state of mind can.

In the next three blinks, you'll learn why compassion, intimacy and spirituality are important for a happier life.

Cultivating universal compassion is a way to a healthier, happier life.

The Dalai Lama places great emphasis on developing and cultivating compassion. It is an important component of not only Buddhist spiritual development but also of robust, lasting happiness.

Compassion can be roughly defined as a state of mind that is nonaggressive: a wish to see others free from suffering. In true compassion, this wish is deep and universal, not related to personal feelings or to attachments to particular people. Rather, it applies to all living creatures, including friends, enemies, and even a fish writhing on a hook.

The Western notion of romantic love can be limiting and is often not enough for a lasting relationship.

Having close, intimate relationships with other people promotes both physical and mental well-being, but the Western viewpoint that deep intimacy can only be achieved through a romantic relationship can be problematic. People who don’t find such a relationship often feel lonely and unhappy.

But in fact, the concept and limitations of intimacy have varied greatly across different times and cultures, and a wealth of intimacy lies beyond the exclusively romantic Western definition. The Dalai Lama himself said he felt an intimate connection with a wide array of people around him, for example his tutors and cooks; he even went as far as discussing state affairs with a cleaner sweeping the floors. By embracing the countless opportunities to connect to other people every day, we can lead happier lives.

Though religious beliefs can be beneficial to happiness, you can cultivate basic spirituality without them.

An important ingredient of leading a happier life is spirituality.

The benefits of a strong religious conviction are well-documented in numerous studies and range from happier families to better health. But, contrary to what many people believe, spirituality is not dependent on any specific religion; the Dalai Lama believes any of the world’s major religions can offer people the opportunity for a happier life.

Suffering is a natural part of life, but we often increase it unnecessarily.

Suffering is a universal and perfectly natural quality of life. Eastern cultures seem to be more accepting of this fact, perhaps because people in Asia tend to live in closer proximity to poverty and daily suffering than their Western counterparts. Westerners tend not to understand that suffering is a part of life, and often see themselves as victims of some malign force when something goes wrong.

But suffering is inevitable; for example, all of us will grow old and die. Trying to avoid or ignore this fact is only a temporary solution. When you inevitably do encounter suffering in one form or another, your mental attitude becomes of paramount importance. If you fear suffering as something unnatural and unfair, you will feel like a victim and assign blame when you should be trying to eliminate the mental root causes of suffering.

We can eliminate negative attitudes, feelings and habits only through sustained effort.

The Dalai Lama believes that negative states of mind like anger and fear are obstructions that stop us from achieving our natural, happy state. They are poisons. But certain positive states of mind – love, compassion, patience, generosity – can act as antidotes to them, eliminating harmful emotions, attitudes and behaviors. Hence, to eliminate negativity, positive emotions and behaviors should be habitually cultivated.

This resembles the essential ideas behind Western cognitive therapy, where maladaptive behaviors and thinking are identified and, in a sense, corrected. Depressed people, for example, often have a distorted way of thinking: they may focus their thoughts exclusively on negative things, such as trouble at work or financial difficulties, and completely overlook the fact that they have much to be happy about, like good health and a charming family. Studies have proven that correcting these distorted modes of thinking can make people happier.

Learn to shift perspectives and find the good in every situation.

When people encounter a negative situation, they tend to see it, very rigidly, as 100 percent negative. Generally though, most situations contain both positive and negative elements and can be viewed from several alternative angles. For example, you might consider having to sit next to an annoying, flatulent person on a plane as a purely negative situation, or you could see it as an opportunity to practice patience and tolerance.

Such a switch can also help you find meaning in pain and suffering. When you next encounter obstacles in your life, do not wallow in self-pity and cry “Why me?!” but instead consider it a chance to become stronger. Find purpose in suffering, and thrive.

Confront and analyze your feelings of anger and hatred, and replace them with patience and tolerance.

Of all the negative mental states, anger and hatred are the greatest obstacles to happiness. When a feeling of anger or hatred arises in us, it rapidly destroys our peace of mind. It also obliterates our judgment, often leading us to take actions that only worsen the situation and make us even angrier. Scientific studies have clearly demonstrated that tendencies toward anger, rage and hostility have negative health effects too; for example, they substantially increase a person’s risk of heart disease.

Anger and hatred cannot be overcome by simply suppressing them. On the other hand, venting anger, such as through raging and shouting, tends to increase negative feelings, not reduce them. Hence, the correct response to anger is to learn how to use the antidotes of patience and tolerance against it, and to cultivate them for example through meditative exercises.

Combat anxiety and low self-confidence by examining your thoughts, motives and capabilities honestly.

Fear, anxiety and worry are things that all people experience from time to time – they are natural responses to certain circumstances – but when they become excessive or constant they can cause serious mental and even physical symptoms, such as weakened immune responses and heart disease.

The sources of anxiety are many, as are the preventative measures that can be applied. Much like the Western psychiatric practice of cognitive intervention, the Dalai Lama favors challenging the thoughts that generate anxiety and replacing them with positive ones.

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What is The Art of Happiness about?

The Art of Happiness (1998) is based on interviews of His Holiness the Dalai Lama conducted by the psychiatrist Howard C. Cutler. The combination of Tibetan Buddhist spiritual tradition with Dr. Cutler’s knowledge of Western therapeutic methods and scientific studies makes this a very accessible guide to everyday happiness. The book spent 97 weeks on the New York Times bestseller list.

Who should read The Art of Happiness?

Anyone interested in how they can deal with suffering and find lasting happiness
Anyone interested in how the Dalai Lama’s teachings intersect with Western therapeutic methods and scientific studies
Anyone struggling with anger, anxiety, guilt or other negative mental states

About the Author

His Holiness the Dalai Lama is a Nobel Peace Prize recipient and the spiritual leader of the Tibetan people. He has lived in exile in Dharamsala, India, since Chinese forces invaded and annexed Tibet in 1959, and he acted as the Tibetan head of state until his retirement in 2011.

Dr. Howard C. Cutler is an American psychiatrist who has studied Tibetan medicine and interviewed the Dalai Lama on several occasions.

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