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Blink 3 of 8 - The 5 AM Club
by Robin Sharma
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Fair Play summary
A Game-Changing Solution for When You Have Too Much to Do (and More Life to Live)
19 mins
Brief summary
"Fair Play" by Eve Rodsky is a practical guide for achieving household equality. It offers a system for dividing and balancing domestic tasks, leading to happier relationships and more fulfilling lives.
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Fair Play
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Key idea 1 of 7
When it comes to looking after the family, many mothers are doing more than their fair share.
The arrival of children can drastically change the dynamic of a marriage. Before Eve Rodsky and her husband started a family, they had an equal relationship. They shared household chores and both had time to focus on their high-flying careers. But when their two sons arrived a few years later, Eve suddenly found herself doing a lot more work than her husband.
And she’s not the only one. Once couples have children, many mothers find their lives become busier and more stressful, while their husbands’ lives stay the same.
Why does this happen? For starters, mothers tend to work what is known as the second shift. This refers to all the routine and unpaid work mothers do for their families over and above their regular jobs. Eve Rodsky’s second shift involved preparing her children’s packed lunches, doing the laundry, and grocery shopping. In contrast, most husbands tend to stick to one shift: their day job.
Secondly, mothers usually take on more emotional labor than their male partners. It often falls to mothers to maintain the family’s relationships and manage people’s feelings: to telephone the in-laws, to send birthday cards to relatives, and to soothe children when they’re unhappy. This thoughtfulness is often what being a great parent is about, but it’s exhausting for women to always be the one keeping everyone happy.
Women, who carry a constant mental to-do list of all their family-related tasks, shoulder an increased mental load. Eve Rodsky found herself overwhelmed by the never-ending stream of small things she had to think about once she had children: Is there enough food in the fridge? Have I packed my son’s gym bag? Does the babysitter know where to find everything? All these considerations can add up to mental overload, making moms anxious, fatigued, and more forgetful.
Despite all the extra tasks mothers do for their families, many of their efforts go unnoticed by their partners. This is why tasks that are traditionally performed by women, like household chores and looking after the children’s schedules, are often called invisible work. Your husband may never notice or appreciate that the bathroom is always stocked with toothpaste or that your children are always wearing clean clothes.
In the next blink, you’ll learn that while your second shift might be invisible, the negative consequences of this unfair situation are clear to see.
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What is Fair Play about?
Fair Play (2019) explores gender inequality in the division of domestic labor and the impact of this inequality on mothers. Packed with practical advice, these blinks also offer couples a radical approach to reallocating domestic chores so that women married to men can get a fairer deal.
Fair Play Review
Fair Play (2019) by Eve Rodsky is a thought-provoking book that explores the dynamics of household and family responsibilities, providing a fresh perspective on the division of labor. Here's why this book is worth reading:
- With its practical, actionable strategies, it offers a roadmap for couples to have open conversations and create a fair and equitable balance in their households.
- By sharing real-life anecdotes and personal experiences, the book brings the concepts to life and makes them relatable and applicable to readers' own lives.
- The book addresses an important and often overlooked topic, sparking meaningful discussions and inspiring readers to challenge traditional gender roles and expectations.
Best quote from Fair Play
We expect women to work like they dont have children and raise children as if they dont work.
—Eve Rodsky
Who should read Fair Play?
- Busy working mothers
- Fathers seeking a better work-life balance
- Stay-at-home moms wanting to change their lives
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Fair Play FAQs
What is the main message of Fair Play?
The main message of Fair Play is to create a system for sharing household and family responsibilities equitably.
How long does it take to read Fair Play?
The estimated reading time for Fair Play is several hours. The Blinkist summary can be read in just 15 minutes.
Is Fair Play a good book? Is it worth reading?
Fair Play is worth reading as it provides practical strategies to achieve balance and fairness in household responsibilities.
Who is the author of Fair Play?
The author of Fair Play is Eve Rodsky.
What to read after Fair Play?
If you're wondering what to read next after Fair Play, here are some recommendations we suggest:
- Getting Everything You Can Out of All You’ve Got by Jay Abraham
- Find Your Unicorn Space by Eve Rodsky
- Flow by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi
- Beyond Order by Jordan B. Peterson
- Raising Mentally Strong Kids by Amen MD Daniel G. & Charles Fay
- Secrets of Adulthood by Gretchen Rubin
- Weekend Language by Andy Craig
- Surrounded by Idiots by Thomas Erikson
- Pig Wrestling by Pete Lindsay
- Nexus by Yuval Noah Harari