Liminal Thinking Book Summary - Liminal Thinking Book explained in key points

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Liminal Thinking summary

Name: Liminal Thinking
Rating: 3.9 (32 reviews)
Author: Dave Gray

Dave Gray

Create the Change You Want by Changing the Way You Think

3.9 (32 ratings)

17 mins

Brief summary

Liminal Thinking explores how our beliefs shape reality and offers practical techniques to change beliefs to improve understanding and collaboration. This book guides us in fostering breakthrough ideas and enhanced communication.

Topics

Innovation Success Self-Help Mental Health Design Thinking Critical Thinking & Problem Solving

Table of Contents

Liminal Thinking
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What’s in it for me? Learn to challenge your beliefs and unlock new possibilities.

Let’s set the scene: Dave Gray, 29, is sitting in his bathrobe, coughing from a chest cold. Despite being unwell, he can’t stop smoking; he’s stuck in the grip of his addiction. As he smokes, he suddenly pictures himself years down the line, struggling to breathe – coughing just like he is now, but as an old man. Something shifts in him at that moment, and he impulsively decides to quit. That’s nothing new. After all, he’s tried and failed many times. But this time, to his surprise, he manages to stick with it. Realizing he can beat what seems unchangeable, he starts to believe that other parts of his life can change too. That one decision leads to more – he ends his relationship, quits his job, moves, and starts a new career.

Gray’s experience led him to understand that the way we see things shapes our reality. He calls this liminal thinking. The word “liminal” comes from the Latin for “threshold,” and it refers to the mental edges that define our outlook on life. These boundaries, while providing structure, often limit us. But what if we could recognize and rethink them, uncovering new possibilities we couldn’t see before?

In this Blink, you’ll learn how to break free from limiting beliefs, challenge your assumptions, and discover new opportunities for personal growth. By implementing nine practical strategies, you’ll start seeing solutions that others miss – even in situations that seem impossible to change.

How your beliefs shape the way you see reality

Have you ever wondered why people often experience the same event but come away with completely different views? It’s because beliefs, which shape how reality is understood, aren’t the same as reality itself – they’re just models of it. There are six principles that explain how beliefs are formed and why people hold onto them, even when they’re incomplete or flawed.

The first principle is that beliefs are models. The story of The Blind Men and the Elephant offers a clear example. Several blind men each touch a different part of an elephant – and then describe it in completely different ways. One feels the tail and says it’s like a rope, another touches the side and believes it’s like a wall, and so on. Each man is convinced his experience reflects the truth, but none of them see the full picture. Just like the blind men, people’s beliefs are based on their limited experiences, which never capture reality in its entirety. Though it’s easy to believe a personal view is true, it’s simply one interpretation of a far more complex world.

The second principle is that beliefs are built from experiences. They don’t appear out of nowhere; instead, they’re created by what a person focuses on and the conclusions they draw from it. Imagine walking into a grocery store. What you notice first depends on what you need – if you’re looking for oranges, you’ll scan for small, round, orange objects. But someone else, perhaps on a tight budget, might only notice sale items. Similarly, in everyday life, what a person pays attention to shapes how they think about the world. Over time, those thoughts turn into judgments, and from those judgments, beliefs are formed. These beliefs feel obvious because they fit past experiences, but they’re only based on a small slice of reality.

The third principle is that beliefs create a shared world. This becomes especially clear when looking at how beliefs affect behavior. Take the story of Spitfire, a rescue dog who acted aggressively when given a bone. He’d snarl and even bite if anyone got too close. Spitfire’s behavior wasn’t random – it came from a belief formed during his tough past, likely a time when he had to fight to keep whatever little food he had. In his mind, protecting food was a matter of survival. But, through positive interactions – he was repeatedly shown that no one was trying to take his food away – his belief began to change. And as it shifted, so did his behavior.

These three principles help explain how beliefs shape the way people see the world, laying the groundwork for the remaining three principles – which we’ll cover next.

How beliefs create blind spots and limit your potential

In the early 1990s, Gray was considering becoming a university professor. Despite being told by both an art teacher and a friend that he couldn’t get the job without a master’s degree, he applied anyway – and ended up being hired.

Gray’s experience taught him that other people’s beliefs, while well-meaning, can limit your sense of what’s possible. And this is the fourth principle: beliefs create blind spots. In other words, beliefs help guide your actions but also create boundaries that can prevent you from seeing real opportunities. Questioning these limiting beliefs – whether they come from others or yourself – can open up new possibilities.

Rethinking assumptions and creating space for change

So you want to improve your ability to think clearly and solve problems?

Start by assuming you’re not objective. When you’re part of a problem, it can be hard to see your own role in it. One senior executive, for instance, found that his team was hiding information from him. He didn’t realize that his strong reactions to bad news made people hesitant to tell him the truth. If you’re part of the system, you’re also part of the problem. To get a clearer view of yourself, ask a few trusted friends to point out traits they see in you that you may not notice. Compare their views with your own, and reflect on any blind spots you discover.

Exploring perspectives and disrupting patterns to create change

To better understand people and situations, it’s important to look at things from various perspectives. Triangulating and validating different viewpoints – the fourth practice – helps you challenge your assumptions. Sometimes, assumptions about others are based on incomplete or false theories, like thinking someone is difficult or unreasonable when you don’t have the full picture. Instead of sticking to your initial beliefs, take a step back and consider other possibilities. For instance, Adrian believed a colleague was working late to outshine everyone else. But when he confronted him, Adrian discovered his colleague had a deeper issue at home. The lesson is simple: if something doesn’t make sense, you’re likely missing a key detail. To test this for yourself, think about someone you struggle with and come up with several possible explanations for their behavior. Then, have a conversation with them to test your theories.

The fifth practice is to ask questions and make connections. This helps you explore a situation by digging deeper into others’ experiences. When Mitchell Sipus, a humanitarian aid worker, was hired by the mayor of Mogadishu to help solve problems in the city, he found that local fishermen were catching plenty of fish but weren’t making money because they lacked proper refrigeration. By asking around, he found someone with a solution – a local ice vendor – and connected the two parties. As a result, the fishermen’s business improved. The key here is to uncover people’s hopes, frustrations, and needs. Ask questions about their goals and challenges, just like Sipus did. Then, make a connection between their problems and a solution they haven’t considered.

Taking small risks and using stories to drive change

The seventh practice encourages you to act as if in the here and now. Jason Roberts, for example, wanted to recreate the vibrant European plazas he had seen in his Dallas neighborhood. But outdated laws made that seem impossible. Instead of accepting these limits, he and his friends staged a temporary transformation. They added crosswalks, put out tables, and turned an empty lot into a park – all without official approval. They then invited the city council to see the result, questioning why such rules existed in the first place. Acting as if those barriers didn’t matter brought the conflict into the open, leading to real change. Pick an area of your life you’d like to improve. Write down your beliefs about it. Then, list alternative ones – even absurd ideas – and act on one to see if it makes a difference.

Humans naturally turn to stories to explain why things are the way they are; stories shape our beliefs and how we make sense of the world. The problem is, these explanations often rely on faulty logic. For instance, executives who see poor sales might blame individual team members instead of investigating the real causes, letting their stories reinforce their existing beliefs. That’s why the eighth practice says to make sense by telling stories, or inviting others to share theirs. In doing so, you can learn more about the beliefs underlying your own or other people’s actions. Reflect on the stories you regularly tell about yourself. What beliefs do they reveal? Now, think about the stories your friends and colleagues share. What do those stories suggest about their beliefs?

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What is Liminal Thinking about?

Liminal Thinking (2016) shows how you can create lasting change by understanding and reframing your beliefs. Drawing from interviews with experts in various fields, it offers six principles and nine practices to help you shape your reality and take control of your life.

Who should read Liminal Thinking?

People looking to grow by challenging their limiting beliefs
Leaders wanting to create change through new perspectives
Problem solvers seeking fresh approaches to difficult situations

About the Author

Dave Gray is the founder of XPLANE, a consultancy specializing in visual thinking and organizational alignment. Drawing on his background in design and leadership, he’s worked with major global companies and startups to foster clarity and collaboration. Gray is also the author of the best-selling books Gamestorming and The Connected Company.

Categories with Liminal Thinking

Career & Success Psychology Personal Development

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