Existential Kink summary

Ever felt like there's something inherently wrong with you? And have you ever tried to cover up that feeling with accomplishments, approval from others, or substances like drugs or alcohol? If so, you’re not alone. This feeling of not being OK can be triggered by anything – a bad day at work, a snarky comment from a friend, or even hearing about someone else's success.

But what if you could transform that feeling of “wrongness” into raw, hot, glorious power? In the author’s journey through life, she’s found that her existential kink – her strange attraction to pain, bondage, and limitation – was actually the key to unlocking her full potential.

For instance, during her recovery from heroin addiction in her twenties, she realized there was a part of her that was secretly turned on by the destructive aspects of her life. She was in an abusive relationship, and while she thought she hated it, deep down, she actually loved the feeling of importance it gave her.

Through this realization, she began to understand that she could change her life by embracing the parts of herself she had previously hidden and shamed. The more she got in touch with these darker aspects, and made them work for her, the more her life began to transform for the better. Today, she has a loving husband, a successful business, a supportive community, and a deeper connection to herself and the world around her.

So how can you use this knowledge to change your own life? Well first, recognize that your shadow – those hidden and shamed parts of yourself – is holding you back from true happiness and success. By bringing your shadow into the light, you can dissolve old negative patterns and open yourself up to receiving more beauty and bounty in your life.

This process is called existential kink, and it's a powerful way to come to terms with your unconscious desires and beliefs. When you integrate your shadow into your everyday self, you become more capable of exerting positive influence in your life and your environment.

But how do you actually do this? Well, you can start by paying attention to the stories and experiences of others who have done this work. Don’t lean away from similarities or patterns in your own life here. Be open to exploring the strange corridors of your psyche and learning to dance with your shadow. Remember that you have the power to change your life, no matter how dark or twisted things might seem. Give yourself permission to embrace all the scary stuff, and watch as your world transforms.