Change Your Thoughts – Change Your Life summary

The second verse of the Tao Te Ching is very much about accepting the paradoxes that are inherent in life. This can be tricky for Western minds to get on board with, since a lot of philosophy and religion in the West is about good and evil, promoting the former while suppressing the latter. 

But one of the major principles in following the way of the Tao is to accept the duality of nature and to hold on to two opposing thoughts without having them cancel each other out. As a result, understanding the Tao can really change the way you think and behave.

The Tao Te Ching teaches that you should strive to reduce desires, to be more content with what you have and to trust that the Tao has provided you with what you need. In the third verse, it’s asserted that to follow the way of the Tao is to decrease both your possessions and your interest in ego-related pursuits such as wealth and power.

The way of the Tao is not about desiring money or power, but instead about being driven by generosity and a desire to help everyone equally, no matter their standing in society.

While there are many metaphors for how to be more aligned with the Tao, a recurring one is to be more like water. The characteristics of water embody a variety of the virtues found in the way of the Tao.

For instance, water doesn’t seek to nourish the life forms around it, it simply does so by coming into contact with them. Water is effortlessly and gently its natural self, and this is something that we should aspire to. Water also has the virtue of always flowing naturally downward, to nourish the areas that are “loathed by all men” – in other words, to help the most neglected areas of the world. This is why being like water is considered one of the highest forms of enlightenment.

Another way the Tao Te Ching challenges our modern values is in its descriptions of strength. In verses 23 and 76, we’re told that strength comes from being flexible and soft, from getting rid of your sharp edges and instead knowing the value of nonaction and bending.

As verse 43 states, “the softest of all things overrides the hardest of all things.” Later, the teachings equate being brittle and stiff with death, while flexibility is “a companion of life.” 

Along with the virtues of an enlightened leader, some verses in the Tao Te Ching also teach about the ways in which one can govern peacefully, in the way of the Tao. Naturally, this involves virtues that avoid the harm and imbalance of violence and war.

Of the messages in verses 68 and 69, the author identifies the virtues of living a life of cooperation, without enemies. In the wisdom of these verses we find that “a good soldier is not violent,” “a good fighter is not angry” and “good winners do not contend.” Also, “there is no greater misfortune than feeling ‘I have an enemy.’”