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Slow Sex

The Path to Fulfilling and Sustainable Sexuality

By Diana Richardson
13-minute read
Audio available
Slow Sex by Diana Richardson

Slow Sex (2011) makes a powerful case for a deceleration of our love lives in order to have more fulfilling sex and deeper, happier relationships. In our hectic and consumer-oriented society, sex is often used as a quick fix for physical satisfaction – but this can leave us feeling empty. Slow sex helps us unfold the potential of our sexuality by learning how to make love in a conscious, mindful way that is ultimately as healing as it is stimulating.

  • Couples seeking to reinvigorate their relationship
  • Anyone interested in having better sex
  • Those curious about meditation and higher states of awareness

Diana Richardson has been teaching meditation and Tantra to couples since 1993. She is also a trained body therapist and has written the best-selling books Tantric Sex for Men, The Heart of Tantric Sex, and Tantric Orgasm for Women.

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Slow Sex

The Path to Fulfilling and Sustainable Sexuality

By Diana Richardson
  • Read in 13 minutes
  • Audio & text available
  • Contains 8 key ideas
Upgrade to Premium Read or listen now
Slow Sex by Diana Richardson
Synopsis

Slow Sex (2011) makes a powerful case for a deceleration of our love lives in order to have more fulfilling sex and deeper, happier relationships. In our hectic and consumer-oriented society, sex is often used as a quick fix for physical satisfaction – but this can leave us feeling empty. Slow sex helps us unfold the potential of our sexuality by learning how to make love in a conscious, mindful way that is ultimately as healing as it is stimulating.

Key idea 1 of 8

Slowness during sex is an elixir for body and soul.

Nowadays, we put a premium on speed and instant gratification. A subway ride without social media, texting, and playing mobile games? Unthinkable. An online purchase without same-day delivery? Disappointing. We want everything, from the food that we order to the series we stream, to be available right now. This desire for immediacy extends into our love lives, too.

Sex is often absurdly fast. Sure, we may pine for it day in and day out – but a lot of the time, gratifying that desire amounts to no more than a quickie before bed. We race to orgasm as if we’ll get a reward for speed, then return to our hectic daily lives without really feeling satisfied or happy. 

But what if satisfying sex is a basic need, just like food? In this sense, we live in a society of people who are sexually undernourished.

The key message here is: Slowness during sex is an elixir for body and soul.

It’s high time to slow down and give sex the attention and space it deserves. It's not so much about what we do, but how we do it. We don't have to run the gamut of contortionist positions or reinvent the sexual wheel. The key to slow sex is to use mindfulness to connect with both your body and your partner. In this way, physical love becomes a spiritual experience.

The following blinks highlight different aspects of slow sex and provide you with simple exercises to try out alone or with your partner. But the suggestions aren’t meant to be yet another thing to add to a long list of to-dos – quite the opposite, actually. Approach slow sex with an easygoing attitude, and spontaneously try the exercises that appeal to you.

At its core, slow sex is a spiritual practice that makes it possible to come into contact with the inner wisdom of your body, and to experience the happiness that ensues. When we understand that our sexuality is not limited to physical pleasure, but is a key to more serenity, joy, and health, we’ll automatically give it more attention and appreciation. In this way, the positive effects of slow sex will be self-reinforcing.

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