Start Where You Are summary

Throughout our lives, we struggle with our sense of obligation not only to others but also to our sense of self-worth and what we should or shouldn’t be doing.

When you wake up in the morning, do you feel hope or fear? Are you excited about the possibilities, or tired of living up to expectations? You might be eager to set out and get things done, or already disappointed with yourself for having had too many pints the night before.

If you’re familiar with Buddhism, you probably know that the ultimate spiritual goal is called nirvana, which is also often translated as “emptiness.”

To Western ears, “emptiness” has a very negative connotation. For example, we say the optimist sees the glass as half-full while the pessimist thinks it’s half-empty. But from a psychological perspective, emptiness can be a great relief.

Many who come to Buddhism for the first time think they should embrace emptiness by closing off their minds or by ignoring pain.

But such techniques are little more than tricks that can be achieved with a bit of meditation practice; it’s a big mistake to think that they are the whole point. Buddhism is about celebrating both the highs and lows of life. This happens by acknowledging and feeling both positive and negative emotions but also learning not to grow attached to them or to try to avoid them.

Some self-help books tell you to start each morning by looking in the mirror and saying things like “Today I’m going to be a better person.” Don’t do this.

Instead, learn to be comfortable with yourself and become familiar with your strengths and weaknesses.

Everyone in the world has their own story. It’s the story that explains everything from where we grew up to who we want to be. These storylines help us explain who we are.

But can you imagine how liberating it would be if we all let go of these stories? It would leave us free to be whatever we wanted to in the present moment, and we’d no longer have to worry about looking foolish or being embarrassed because of the expectations created by our defining stories.

Hopefully, these blinks will bring you closer to accepting the darkness within yourself and others so that you can live truthfully.

By making meditation part of your daily life, you’ll be moving toward a clear-mindedness and a greater awareness of those around you. Remember, being present means coming to terms with suffering, especially that of those who need help.