Name: How to Meet Your Self
Rating: 4.2 (173 reviews)
Author: Nicole LePera

What’s in it for me? Find out who you really are.

Maybe you feel like something needs to change in your life, but you’re not sure what, exactly. Perhaps there’s an underlying dissatisfaction or unhappiness that you can’t quite explain.

This is something that the author, psychologist Nicole LePera, experienced for many years. The people she works with, and her vast online community, have also struggled with similar issues. So many of us feel stuck or unhappy without really knowing why.

Part of the problem, according to LePera, is that we don’t really know who we are. We’re not fully aware of what we’re experiencing, and we don’t understand why we feel the way we do. Basically, we’re out of touch with our true selves.

After going through a breakdown a few years ago, LePera embarked on a journey of healing and self-discovery. She also began the process of getting to know her true, authentic self.

Now, she wants to help others to do the same. You can learn how to become more self-aware, and in doing so, find out who you really are.

Of course, these transformations don’t happen overnight. But you may be surprised by just how simple the exercises are. These are things that anyone can do. You just need to have an attitude of curiosity and self-compassion, and be willing to do the work.

One day, you’ll meet yourself – the real you. Let’s find out how to get there.

Become conscious.

A few years ago, the author, Nicole LePera, felt stuck.

On Monday morning she would drag herself out of bed, go to work, and then go through the week on autopilot, feeling burned out and exhausted. As a therapist, she was focused on helping others, but she was barely conscious of her own needs.

Does this sound familiar? So often, we find ourselves stuck on autopilot. We sleepwalk through life, rather than acting consciously.

According to LePera, we have a “habit self,” which is unconscious, and formed through our past experiences. For example, your habit self could be irritable and quick to anger. Maybe you find yourself snapping at your partner or children without knowing why.

But your habit self is not the real you. So it’s time to break the habit.

The first step is to become conscious. You need to be fully aware of your habits in order to change them.

“Consciousness” may sound like a daunting concept, but it’s actually very simple. You’re going to become conscious right now. Ready?

Close your eyes.

Now, notice any thoughts that appear. Maybe you find yourself thinking about something you have to do later.

Then pay attention to any sensations in your body. What do you notice? Feelings of hunger? Boredom?

You can open your eyes now.

Congratulations, you’ve just become conscious. That’s really all there is to it – becoming aware of what you’re experiencing, both internally and externally.

Consciousness helps us to gain self-awareness. When you’re conscious, you’re no longer living on autopilot. So you can see that your habits are not really you – they’re just automatic, conditioned behavior. That’s why becoming conscious is an essential part of discovering your true self.

And it’s something you can practice. Try the “daily consciousness check-in.”

Choose three moments during the day to take a pause. Set an alarm or a reminder on your phone, if you like, so you don’t forget. Then, during these moments, ask yourself, “What am I doing?” and “Where’s my attention right now?”

There are also many other ways you can practice becoming conscious, as part of your daily routine.

For instance, really savor ordinary experiences like eating a meal, or having a shower. Check in with your senses, and notice what you’re feeling in that moment.

Also, start to consciously notice your breath. Pause every now and then, and pay attention to your breathing. Is it slow or quick? Shallow or deep? See if certain thoughts or experiences change your breathing pattern.

Turn these exercises into habits. Over time, consciousness will become easier, and more automatic.

When you take up a new habit, you’re creating new neural pathways in the brain. Thanks to a quality known as neuroplasticity, our brains are constantly changing. And we can change them, through our own behavior.

So, keep that in mind. Even if you feel stuck, you can always take up new, positive habits. You have the power to rewire your brain.

Listen to your body.

As you become more conscious, you should also become more aware of your body – your physical sensations and needs.

If you’ve been living on autopilot, you may be feeling a little detached. You might not be consciously aware of the messages that your body is sending you.

Final Summary

Instead of sleepwalking through life, use simple exercises like consciousness check-ins to become more aware of what’s going on inside you. With practice, you’ll find it easier to tune into your body and emotions, and connect with your authentic self. As you get to know the real you, you can start to make changes, and become an even better version of yourself. From now on, no more autopilot – you’re in control.

Actionable advice:

Kernaussagen in How to Meet Your Self