Radical Acceptance summary

Do you ever feel stuck in a rut? If so, you might have something in common with a white tiger named Mohini.

Mohini lived in the National Zoo, in Washington, DC, in the 1970s. After being kept in a small cage for many years, Mohini was transferred to an enclosure with acres of space, trees and even a pond. Her owners at the zoo were sure she'd love her spacious new home.

Dealing with pain is hard. Maybe you had to witness a loved one fighting with a terminal illness. Or maybe you were laid off at work. Whatever the case, even though we know deep down that we can’t control these painful situations, we often try to manage them.

For instance, if someone insults you, you might lash out at them or vow to cut them out of your life altogether. This might seem like an appropriate reaction, but responding like this is likely to make you feel worse, not better.

When in a distressing situation, we tend to panic. If this sounds familiar, you can learn something from Jacob, one of the author’s colleagues.

Jacob was an experienced meditation teacher, who was also in the early stages of Alzheimer's disease. Standing in front of a class of meditation students, he found himself suddenly confused and unsure of where he was. Importantly, though, Jacob didn’t panic. Instead, he told his students how he was feeling. He admitted to being scared, confused and disoriented.

When someone lets you down, it’s easy to lose your temper. When the author discovered that her son had failed yet again to do his homework, her first impulse was to angrily confront him. But then she opted for a different approach.

Before storming into her son’s room, she stopped and focused on the physical sensations her body was experiencing.

Sometimes it's hard to love ourselves. Daniel was a meditation student who considered himself the world’s most critical person, and most of his criticism was directed inward. He constantly criticized himself for everything that went wrong in his life, from his divorce to his back pain.

He couldn’t even meditate without intrusive thoughts that he was doing it all wrong.