Name: Simplicity Parenting
Rating: 4.3 (151 reviews)
Author: Kim John Payne and Lisa M. Ross

What’s in it for me? Simplify your way to great parenting.

Raising children in today’s world is one heck of a challenge. Even buying toys is a fraught undertaking. What kind should you buy? Educational ones? Fun ones? And how many? Is it better to encourage children to play sports, or study music – or both? And how much “adult” stuff, such as news and politics, should they be exposed to, and at what age?

While there is no single right answer to these questions, there is one thing that every child definitely needs, and that is simplicity. Simplicity in the face of all the clutter, noise and uncertainty of the modern world. Simplicity so they have room to grow and learn at their own pace.

The good news is that you can help them achieve this. How? By detoxifying their environment, by giving them a clear daily rhythm, by balancing their schedules and by filtering out the adult world. Let’s delve into the details.

In these blinks, you'll learn

how predictability is key to learning;
why doing nothing is as important as doing something; and
why Barbies are too complete a toy.

The hectic modern world can have a detrimental effect on the well-being of children.

Most people live ridiculously overloaded lives. We’re constantly staring at our phones or computers and, if we do look up or step outside, it’s only to be bombarded by advertisements on billboards and buses and buildings. Life in today’s modern age is extremely hectic.

As adults, we can cope with this constant inundation, but for children, it’s a whole different story. They struggle to handle the stress caused by this cascade of stimuli – so much so that it can alter the way they behave. This condition is what the author refers to as cumulative stress reaction, or CSR.

In his work as a teacher and private consultant, the author often saw children in states of acute stress, anxiety and nervousness – all of which are symptomatic of CSR. They become hypervigilant and overly controlling, and they exhibit little resilience or empathy.

Of course, a child’s life shouldn’t be completely stress-free, which is just as well since you can’t prevent them from experiencing stress and trauma; they’ll probably fall out of a tree or get into a fight with one of their friends at some point. But these experiences build their resilience, improve their understanding of the world and also teach them how to behave.

However, when children are constantly stressed, their resilience doesn’t improve; rather, it declines, resulting in the above-mentioned symptoms of CSR.

Take the example of James, whose parents reached out to the author for help. They were worried about James’s anxiety, which was getting worse and worse.

James’s parents were educated people; they enjoyed engaging in intellectual debate and staying abreast of current events – CNN was on in their household 24/7. But being constantly involved in this adult world was having a detrimental effect on their son. Eventually, he started to show symptoms of CSR – he became controlling and highly nervous. In fact, he didn’t learn how to ride a bike until he was eight years old because he was too scared about the possibility of falling off.

To maintain your child’s well-being, it’s important to simplify his life as much as possible. You’ll learn how to go about doing this in the following blinks.

Create more rhythm in your day-to-day family life.

Even people living alone often struggle to maintain a daily rhythm, so you can imagine the difficulty of keeping a consistent schedule when there’s a whole family that’s supposed to stick to it.

When the author asks families what their typical day is like, most respond that they have no such thing.

Protect your child from the adult world by reducing the number of screens in your home.

In our fast-paced society, the majority of adults are under a lot of strain, which is causing widespread anxiety. And this anxiety is spilling over to children.

To protect them, it’s important to separate children from the adult world. An easy way to do this is to curtail the constant stream of information that’s broadcast through all the screens surrounding us.

Kernaussagen in Simplicity Parenting

Worum geht es in Simplicity Parenting?

Simplicity Parenting (2009) teaches parents how to reduce the levels of stress experienced by their children. Parents can accomplish this by controlling their children’s environment, limiting their access to the adult world and providing them with a steady, rhythmic schedule. Taking these simple steps will improve family life for all involved.

Über den Autor

Kim John Payne is an expert in child-rearing with 27 years of experience in school, adult and family counseling. His other books include The Games Children Play (1996) and Being At Your Best When Your Kids Are At Their Worst (2017).

Lisa M. Ross is a writer and former literary agent. She has worked in the publishing business for 20 years but currently works as a writer and ghostwriter.