The Other Side of Change summary

At sixteen, Dwayne Betts marked time in jail by scratching lines into the wall. Locked in a windowless basement cell with almost nothing to do but wait, he watched the days blur together. Before long, his world felt as small as the room he was trapped inside.

How did he end up there? Well, a month after his 16th birthday, he had gone to a mall with a friend and a few older guys. Tired of feeling powerless in the world, he asked for a gun. In the parking lot, he approached a man sleeping in his car, told him to get out, and drove away with his wallet, keys, and car.  He was arrested the next day, tried as an adult, and sentenced to nine years in prison. Behind bars, he lived with constant fear – not just of violence, but of the person he might become.

Early in 2020, jjournalist Matt Gutman was in his kitchen making breakfast for his kids when his phone rang. A helicopter had gone down in Southern California. Kobe Bryant was reportedly on board, and Matt needed to get on the air immediately.

As he drove toward the scene, his body shifted into high alert. His heart pounded. His hands trembled. His chest tightened, and every breath felt strained. By then, Matt had spent two decades as a journalist. He'd also spent much of that time dealing with panic attacks. The trigger was often the same: the fear of failing in public, especially when the stakes were high and every word felt like it might be judged.

Tara Sharp adored her father, Felix. He was a generous artist who gave endlessly to his community. But at home, his moods could shift without warning, and Tara learned to stay constantly alert to the signals he was sending. She got good grades, stayed out of trouble, and learned to keep her own needs small. Love felt safest when it was carefully managed.

Then, during Tara's first week of college, Felix died by suicide.

Ingrid Rojas Contreras grew up in Bogotá surrounded by stories of spiritual healing. There were tales of her grandfather's rituals, her mother's gifts, and a family lineage that seemed touched by something supernatural.

But alongside those stories was a rule her mother made very clear: don't share them outside the family. The reason wasn't that the stories were untrue. It was that the outside world could respond with ridicule, hostility, or even violence. Keeping these stories private was a way of staying safe. However, the longer she kept the stories secret, the more she started to feel a sense of shame about them. Why conceal them unless there was inherently something wrong with them?

Maryann Gray felt like her life was opening up. At twenty-two, she’d dropped out of grad school, defied her parents’ plans, and moved toward a freer, more authentic version of herself. Then, driving back to her apartment one day, a child ran into the road. She hit him. His name was Brian, and he died.

At twenty-two, Maryann Gray felt like her life was finally opening up. She had dropped out of grad school, pushed back against her parents' expectations, and begun moving toward a version of herself that felt freer and more authentic.