How Am I Doing? Buchzusammenfassung - das Wichtigste aus How Am I Doing?

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Zusammenfassung von How Am I Doing?

Name: How Am I Doing?
Rating: 4.2 (101 reviews)
Author: Corey Yeager

Corey Yeager

40 Conversations to Have with Yourself

4.2 (101 Bewertungen)

19 Min.

Themen

Achtsames Lieben Persönlichkeit Erfülltes Leben Emotionale Intelligenz

Inhaltsübersicht

How Am I Doing?
in 8 Kernaussagen verstehen

Audio & Text in der Blinkist App

Kernaussage 1 von 8

What’s in it for me? Get to know yourself better and build towards the person you aspire to be.

Admit it or not, you've caught yourself talking to yourself before. Yes, it does sound a little trippy and you probably wondered if you're going nuts for doing so. But you know what? There’s absolutely nothing crazy about it!

Self-talk, or those little thoughts and comments you have in your head, is just as healthy as talking to a friend or therapist. Those inner dialogues are more than what they seem. They’re a safe space for you to go deep down and identify who you really are.

And that’s exactly what this Blink to How Am I Doing by Dr. Corey Yeager aims to do. Featuring eight out of Dr. Yeager's 40 questions, this Blink provides you with a road map to become more aware of your thoughts, feelings, and actions for you to effectively foster personal growth. By having these conversations with yourself, you can gain the clarity and confidence to make better decisions and shape your life as you see fit.

So, get comfortable chatting with yourself and begin your journey of self-discovery!

Who do you value in your life the most?

Have you ever stopped and thought about who the most important person in your life is? Is it your mom who took care of you from birth? Or perhaps your spouse who has sacrificed so much for you? Or your mentor who pulled you from rock bottom and molded you into who you are now?

If you’re like most people, your answer probably lies somewhere along those lines. But here’s the thing: that kind of answer is wrong.

No matter how old you are or what you've gone through, there should only be one important person in your life.

You.

You should treat no one else with utmost value than yourself. Yes, that sounds like a selfish thing to say. After all, shouldn't you put others' needs before yourself?

However, you need to remember that you can't pour from an empty cup. If you can't take care of yourself, you won't be able to care for others, too. They need genuine attention and love, the kind that you can't offer if you're running on empty.

That's why you should never feel the slightest bit of guilt for getting some me time. Plan an entire day for yourself if you can. It won't be easy to do overnight, especially if you're wired to prioritize others. But you can always go slow and steady.

A helpful trick is keeping a log of situations where you put yourself first and the situations where you hesitated to do so. Reflect on this log at the end of the week and think about how you can change things up.

Of course, there will be times when you need to put others before yourself, such as helping an elder with groceries or staying up late to watch over your sick dad. But you have to be mindful of when you need a break from it all and take a day for yourself.

How can you describe your craziest dreams?

When you really think about it and let your mind wander, you realize that you have the wildest dreams. You want to be a scientist spending their days swimming on the beach. Or perhaps you love colors so much you want to start your very own paint brand. Or maybe you're a sucker for theater plays and would be happy to get paid for watching them all year round.

These are the kind of dreams you normally don't hear about, but while they are wild, they aren't impossible. They are very much attainable if only you set your mind to them.

How long do you look in the mirror?

Don’t you just hate mirrors? They show you that fresh pimple on your nose and the ugly blemishes on your cheeks. And when you often look at one, people think you’re vain and only care about appearances. So you avoid mirrors as much as possible.

On the contrary, mirrors should actually be your best friend. They are the best tools for turning yourself into the person you want to be. When you look in the mirror, you can see yourself not as you but as an entirely separate person, one with a wider perspective. Talking to this person will help you evaluate your values, learn things about yourself, and push your inner self toward the surface.

What opportunities for freedom do your vulnerabilities present?

Imagine walking up to someone on the street and asking them about their weakness. Do you think they would respond? Probably not. What you get would likely be a confused face and them facing the other way.

That sounds about right. After all, people never like admitting their weaknesses, probably because they're embarrassed and don't want others to see them as inferior or lacking. Instead, they do all they can to cover it up and keep it as tucked away from the world as possible.

Are you aware what causes your anger?

You walk into your office on a Friday morning with a smile. Then, you receive a text from your significant other, asking for a rain check because they can’t come to your dinner date later tonight. You’re grumpy all day and can’t function well. When you got home, you took a moment and reflected. Were you really angry or were you disappointed?

More often than not, anger is just a secondary emotion for either disappointment, sadness, or any variation of the two. When you're disappointed that you didn't win the game, you mask it with anger. When you're sad about your pet's passing, you mask it with anger. It becomes the surface-level emotion because it's almost always easier to release. You can punch a wall, shout at someone, or say all the curse words you can think of.

What one past experience would you like to change and why?

You stumble across a time machine that can take you anywhere and anytime. The moment you realized what it was, you immediately thought of that one time in your past that you want to change. It’s probably the time you slept in and missed that important university entrance exam. Or the time you rejected the offer to work overseas. Or the time you said “I do” despite your friends and family telling you not to.

Admit it, you have that one experience in your past you’d want to change. Everyone does. However, no matter how hard you try, you can never change what has already happened. What’s done is done.

What is the one mistake that has taught you the most?

If you’ve never made a mistake in your life, you’re lying. Mistakes are an inevitable part of life, and no matter how good, careful, and obedient you are, you will commit a mistake whether you intend to or not. It can happen anytime and anywhere, and while you can't undo them, what counts is what you do afterward.

Most of the time, this means owning the mistake, making amends with whomever you might have hurt, and pledging to improve yourself, so it won't happen the next time around. This may sound like the right thing to do, but these simple steps are actually just scratching the surface. You shouldn't stop at just promising to do better next time. It isn't a guarantee that you won't repeat the same mistake.

How much can you accomplish in 23 seconds?

If asked what you can accomplish in a minute, you can probably name a thing or two. You can go up a flight of stairs or chug a glass of water or do 15 jumping jacks. But what if you shorten that single minute to 23 seconds? What can you do now?

Normally, you wouldn't bother doing anything if you were told you only have such a short timeframe. After all, you probably wouldn't finish anything during that period. So instead, you just stare blankly at a wall or scroll mindlessly on social media, throwing that precious time away.

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Worum geht es in How Am I Doing??

How Am I Doing? (2022) helps you dive deep into your thoughts and find yourself. It features 40 introspective questions designed to prompt you to mend yourself and discover the path to the person you want to become.

Wer How Am I Doing? lesen sollte

People who want to gain a better understanding of themselves
High school or college graduates looking for their next path
Anyone interested in personal growth and self-improvement

Über den Autor

Dr. Corey Yeager is licensed in the field of marriage and family therapy. He is currently working as the NBA Detroit Pistons' team psychotherapist and is deeply committed to educating and helping service organizations and the African-American community via his therapeutic work.

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