Quiet summary

The vast majority of introverts have yet another personality trait in common: they are highly sensitive. Extroverts, on the other hand, rarely exhibit this characteristic.

People who are highly sensitive process information from their environment in an unusually thorough way. For instance, if they are told to search for images in picture puzzles, they will take more time observing and get more involved with the photos than those who are not highly sensitive.

We all feel comfortable in different situations. Some people can think of no greater pleasure than sitting in a library; to them, even the thought of going to a techno club is unfathomable. Others are the polar opposite: there is no place they feel more at home than among a throbbing mass of people, and it would drive them crazy to spend a single afternoon in the library.

Why are these stark differences?

Not only biology and genetics shape our temperament: the experiences we amass over the course of our lives do, too. This holds especially true for childhood experiences.

Extroverted children respond to environmental influences like dandelions: they thrive just about anywhere and are virtually incapable of being thrown off track. Introverted children are more like orchids: in a supportive environment, they flourish; in the wrong place, they close up.

Who would you consider more competent: an extrovert who captivates other people’s attention and sets the tone, or an introvert who sits quietly in the corner and listens?

Western society has a very clear answer to such questions. Extroverts are not only considered more qualified and intelligent because of their sociability but also more interesting and cooperative.

Dale Carnegie grew up in a small town in Missouri at the beginning of the twentieth century. He was a typical introvert – skinny, unathletic and nervous: far from being a great orator.

But when a speaker from the adult education movement came to Carnegie’s hometown, he was enchanted by the man’s talent. Later, in college, he was also impressed by the winners of the rhetoric competition, who were considered the leaders of the future.

Time and time again, every ambitious introvert ends up in situations where being extroverted is a must. Take a college professor as an example. Imagine that this professor is shy and reserved, but also wants to fill her students with enthusiasm for her subject matter.

Even if she has an introverted temperament, this does not prevent her from switching into extrovert mode. By reflecting upon herself and others, she can learn to adapt her manner to various different situations, and to flip the extroversion switch at just the right moment.

Many employers firmly believe that their staff works best when their workplaces are perfectly tailored to the ideal of the extroverted employee. As a result, it’s very common today to work in open offices, perform group-brainstorming sessions and present workshop results in interactive PowerPoint presentations.

So how do introverts cope with working in an open office or participating in group discussions? They’re constantly interrupted; it’s loud; their coworkers are openly hostile. Stimuli rain down on them and cause stress. Is it really possible for them to work well and maximize their potential in such an environment?

How can employers best use the distinct strengths of their introverted and extroverted employees? In order to get to the bottom of this, a group of scientists asked several teams to perform a simple task – quickly folding T-shirts under the guidance of either an extroverted or an introverted leader.

Extroverted team leaders, although successful in getting their team to adhere precisely to the rules and work by the book to achieve great performance levels, were less successful in responding to individuals’ suggestions – for example, how the T-shirts could be folded more quickly and efficiently.

Interactions between introverts and extroverts are frequently marked by misunderstanding. When conflicts arise, extroverts tend to grow hostile and take the offensive, overpowering or overwhelming the introverts. The typical introvert retreats from an open conflict because he or she finds it unpleasant – which the extrovert more often than not interprets as a lack of interest.

It is only when both temperaments open up to one another and try to understand the other’s perspective that they can achieve great results together.