Best Self Book Summary - Best Self Book explained in key points

Best Self summary

Mike Bayer

Be You, Only Better

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What is Best Self about?

Best Self (2019) is a self-help manual for everyone who’s sick of simply surviving and is ready to start thriving. Life coach Mike Bayer argues that it’s essential to dump your toxic anti-self and put your best self in the driver’s seat. It’s not easy, but it’s possible – just ask the thousands of clients whose lives have been changed by Bayer’s insistence that they start being honest with themselves and learn to face down their deepest fears. Packed full of actionable tips and insights, these blinks will help you do just that.

About the Author

Mike Bayer, better known as Coach Mike, is the founder and CEO of CAST Centers, a clinic specializing in helping people to live happier, more authentic lives. The mind behind the CAST Foundation, an initiative to destigmatize mental health issues, Bayer is also a member of Dr. Phil McGraw’s advisory board and a regular guest on the Dr. Phil show.

Key idea 1 of 6

Few people are taught how to be their best selves, but you can start by defining your authentic self.

“You’re unique.” It’s a line you’ve probably heard a million times, but have you ever let it sink in? Nobody on Earth will know what it’s like to walk in your shoes. Every thought, experience and feeling you have is yours alone; there’s never been, and will never be, another you!

Chances are, however, that you were never taught how to be your best self. You entered the world as a blank slate which your parents filled with their own failings and hang-ups. Then came school. Sure, you learned all sorts of things, but what about connecting with who you really are? It’s pretty much the most important skill in the world, but you won’t find it on any curriculum.

The result is that we often end up leading lives which feel a little off. There’s a vague sense we’re not being our true selves, but we’re not sure what to do about it. So how do you become yourself?

Here’s how the author breaks it down. We all have two types of self: a positive best self – the person you’d like to be more often – and a negative anti-self which stops you being that person. The key is to learn to tell which self is in control. The best way to do that is to flesh out these characters and give them recognizable attributes.

Let’s start with the best self.

On a piece of paper, write down all of your positive traits: the things you admire most about yourself but don’t always act upon. Think of adjectives like “friendly,” “logical” or “brave.” That might be hard – after all, it’s much easier to criticize than praise yourself – but stick with it.

Next, put a face to that bundle of attributes. Does your best self have a specific gender? Is it an animal or mythical creature? What’s its superpower? The author’s, for example, is a wise wizard called Merlin while one of his clients has an upbeat squirrel called Ralph!

Once you’ve settled on your best self’s appearance and character, you’ll want to sketch it. Don’t worry, this doesn’t have to be a masterpiece. The important thing is to have a representation to hang somewhere in your home to remind yourself of who you want to be.

Next, we’ll take a closer look at your best self’s nemesis: the anti-self.

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Who should read Best Self

  • Self-helpers
  • Innovators
  • Those struggling to find deeper meaning in their lives

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