Managing Up summary

People often say that we should behave toward others as we would like them to behave toward us. But what if we’re all so different from one another that what we actually want is to be treated differently? 

To get along with your boss, you’ll need to determine her workplace personality and treat her accordingly. And in any workplace, there are several distinct personality types. 

Does your boss constantly stop by your desk to ask you what you’re doing? Does he explain, in minute detail, how to do a task, even when you know more about it than he does? Is anything but his way the wrong way? If any of these situations sound familiar, then you’ve likely ended up with a micromanaging boss.  

The micromanager is the boss who constantly looks over your shoulder and scrutinizes everything you do. Unsurprisingly, dealing with this sort of boss can be highly frustrating. Not only do all humans have an intrinsic need for autonomy and independence, but from a career perspective, micromanager bosses can stifle your potential for professional growth. 

It’s easy to imagine the frustration of dealing with a micromanaging boss. After all, we’ve all dealt with overbearing people before. What about the exact opposite, though? A boss who lets you do your own thing 24/7 sounds pretty cool, but the truth is that an absentee boss who doesn’t seem to know or care what you’re doing can be just as challenging to deal with as a micromanager.

The absentee boss, either by accident or design, is simply never around when you need her. You might go a whole week without having a meaningful discussion with her, and whenever you need support, she makes it clear that she can’t help you.  

Some bosses seem great when you first meet them. During your recruitment interview, they come off as charming, charismatic and highly skilled – the type of person you’d kill to work for. But then, after a few weeks of working for them, things take a turn for the worse. That perfect leader is actually a power-crazed, egotistical nightmare. If this sounds familiar, then you’ve probably brushed up against the narcissist boss. 

There are certain unmistakable traits of this hellish breed of leader. 

Does your boss spend a lot of time focusing on irrelevant things? Does she fail to make decisions, preferring to sit back and be inactive? Do you feel like you’re working in the dark, because she doesn’t keep you in the loop? If any of these scenarios sound familiar, then you’ve probably had the misfortune to work for an incompetent boss. 

This type of manager doesn’t mean any harm, but that doesn’t mean she won’t wreak havoc on both your morale and your productivity anyway. 

As a child, the author was given a clear message by his parents: don’t be a quitter. If he started something, they said, he needed to finish it too, whether it was after-school sports or part-time babysitting. For those of us who have also grown up with the philosophy that winners don’t quit, walking away from something can feel like a shameful failure. But the truth is that when it comes to really bad bosses, sometimes you just need to do the unthinkable: leave. 

While strategies can help you deal with difficult managers, you shouldn’t ignore warning signs that it’s time for you to move on from the situation altogether.