The Happiness Project Buchzusammenfassung - das Wichtigste aus The Happiness Project

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Zusammenfassung von The Happiness Project

Name: The Happiness Project
Rating: 4.4 (201 reviews)
Author: Gretchen Rubin

Gretchen Rubin

Or, Why I Spent a Year Trying to Sing in the Morning, Clean My Closets, Fight Right, Read Aristotle, and Generally Have More Fun

4.4 (201 Bewertungen)

24 Min.

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Inspiration Simplify Podcast Happiness Routines & Habits

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The Happiness Project
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What’s in it for me? Look for happiness and find it – in all facets of life.

For thousands of years, humankind and its philosophers have tackled the question of happiness. Aristotle declared that happiness was the summum bonum,or the chief good in life – that it was the sense and purpose of the entire human existence. But what is happiness and how can we achieve it?

To approach this question, Gretchen Rubin dived into research, turning to the most important thinkers, psychologists, writers, intellectuals and researchers for ideas on the subject. Factoring her personal experiences into the mix, she came to this realization: happiness has many facets. But we know when we’re happy and there are ways to enhance happiness.

With that in mind, she launched her happiness project. Over the course of one year, she dedicated each month to a different area of life in which she tried to boost the level of her own personal happiness.

She saw a particularly high potential for boosting happiness in the following areas of life and thought:

Social relationships (partners, children, friends),
Structuring time (work, play, hobbies),
Prospects/point of view/perspective (basic attitude, contemplation of eternity),
Money and vitality.

Her happiness project didn’t usher in 100 percent sunny days, but she managed to secure various little islands of happiness and lay the foundation for more moments of happiness by taking small, constructive steps such as a good exercise regimen, a better time management system and a more balanced everyday life with her family.

She experienced many interesting things about herself along the way. She stuck to pre-established basic principles that enabled her to, above all, reduce negative feelings. Because, as Rubin found out, it’s usually our own wrongdoing that makes us unhappy. Once she stopped allowing herself to form feelings based on her inclination to nag and gossip, amass useless things and pay too little attention to her health, she was consequently happier.

In her book, Rubin describes what constituted her personal increase of happiness and how we can apply it to our own lives.

On the road to happiness: make good resolutions and take small steps.

Given that people are better suited to working toward concrete goals than abstract things like being happy, Gretchen Rubin gave herself concretely formulated and measurable resolutions and requirements that she adhered to throughout the entire project. They served as universal principles to be followed in each of the phases of the experiment she undertook.

Rubin knew what easily soured her mood and tried to avoid those things using her resolutions. By giving herself instructions such as “Do it now!” and “Be Gretchen!” she hoped to achieve positive feelings in all kinds of situations. What she saw was a basic opportunity to feel more happiness by, for example, simply carrying out tasks as they arose (rather than putting them off) and staying true to herself every step of the way.

She had several realizations concerning these general guidelines, which she had amassed over the course of her life. She then repeated these to herself constantly during each phase of her project – regardless of whether she was seeking a professional challenge or more harmony in her family life.

For example, phrases like “People usually notice your mistakes less than you think,” “You don’t have to be good at everything,” or “What you do every day matters more than what you do once in a while,” helped her to stay focused when things got rocky and not lose sight of her path to happiness.

Finally, Rubin realized that the small steps and moments of happiness were what really helped her achieve the desired change. With the motto Change your life without changing your life, she wanted to attain the highest level of happiness possible from the most mundane of situations. Rather than dropping out of society and moving to the rainforest or turning her life completely on its head in her search for happiness, she simply wanted to become a little happier and more satisfied with the life she was already leading.

Release your vital energy: be active and get rid of energy guzzlers.

It’s indisputable that energy and vitality are fundamental factors in self-satisfaction. Feeling physically and mentally fit is enough to make us happy. And feeling energized makes us want to engage in other activities, like sports or social events, which in turn generate moments of happiness. That’s why “more energy” was the top priority of Rubin’s happiness project.

But what generates energy? It may sound banal, but it’s true: enough sleep, a balanced diet and physical activity. A lack of sleep weakens our immune systems and memories and slows down our metabolism. Outdoor activities, by contrast, raise our energy level and help us improve our thinking. It’s been proven that light is good for the psyche and stimulates the production of serotonin and dopamine, two hormones responsible for feelings of happiness.

For a harmonious relationship, work on yourself: it will prevent negative experiences.

Rubin established the following in her research: happy people’s relationships last longer. And it also works the other way around: harmonious relationships set the standard for the happiness we feel elsewhere in life.

Rubin based the part of her project dedicated to her marital happiness on two basic insights into relationships:

Happiness rubs off on others: if our children have fun, so do we.

Many adults say that children are the greatest source of happiness in their lives. Rubin considers them a kind of happiness that we don’t see in a specific moment, but in the long term. In order to foster this happiness, she decided to be more tender and playful with her two daughters as part of her project.

Rubin had two resolutions: to control emotional outbursts directed at her children and to refrain from scolding them. Her strategy? When we act happily, we are happy. Someone who – like Rubin – is easily irritated and gets angry about childish behavior would benefit from singing every morning and acting as if they were in the best of moods. By doing so, we can infect ourselves with a good mood and begin our day that way. Finding humor in our challenges – for instance, by making a joke instead of a reproach – brightens up our everyday life.

Shared joy is joy doubled: making time for friends brings fun into the stress of everyday life.

Friendship is an essential part of a happy life: good friends we can trust and talk to and have fun with help us to get through our stressful everyday life with a smile.

And so it’s all the more paradoxical that many social contacts are at risk in a happy life. We always end up with the feeling that we don’t have enough time for all our friends. Rubin also experienced this, which caused her to feel guilty and angry with herself. She thus decided to deliberately make time for her social life and make new friends in the process.

With the right job, new challenges and growth make us feel happy about our work.

Happiness and work are inextricably linked in our society. When we work, we maintain social ties and feel valued. The feeling of growth we get from working is an inexhaustible source of self-confidence and recognition.

Ever since becoming a writer, Rubin just keeps on working – even when she’s having a bad day – and often gets a kick by knowing that she’s gotten something done despite a bad mood. Deciding to start a career as a writer was a huge step for her, as she was coming from a stable job in the legal field. But it paid off: now her passion – writing – is her career. She urges others to work up the courage to make such a rupture in their lives, whatever their passion might be. Because if your job happens to be your favorite thing to do, it can be a great source of happiness.

Do more activities you truly enjoy in your leisure time.

One big – and indisputable – happiness factor is having free time full of fun and relaxation. Because doing things that don’t serve any purpose other than our own personal enjoyment makes us happy.

But “fun” means something different to everybody. And many people – Rubin among them – have a guilty conscience because they consider other people’s hobbies more cultivated or creative than their own. And she realized that, even if sporting events, crossword puzzles or knitting were great leisure activities for other people, they weren’t necessarily the right ones for her. If you’ve enjoyed something since you were ten, it’s a good indicator that it’s something you truly have fun doing.

You can’t buy happiness – but you can buy worthwhile things that make you happy.

We’ve all heard it before: money can’t buy happiness. But the subject isn’t closed so simply. Because money is like health: it’s not a guarantee of happiness, but not having to worry about it makes our lives a whole lot easier.

Money can help us to be happier if we spend it wisely. Initially, a sufficient amount of money is an important happiness factor for many people who strive for security in their lives. But Rubin also specifically searched for ways to use money to fulfill her remaining resolutions to boost happiness. For example, she began to spend more money on a good fitness program, a healthy diet and social events.

Spiritual support: become aware of happiness in the here and now.

If we believe studies on the subject, spiritual people are happier and healthier, can handle stress better and live longer. Contemplating eternity and death – a central part of many religions and of philosophy – enables another approach to the present and happiness. Rubin was fascinated by the idea of living her life filled with gratitude while thinking about eternity.

She then came up with the following insight: “The days are long, but the years are short.” This motivated her to become aware of both her existence and her transience during her project.

Combat negative feelings with mindfulness and by expanding your consciousness.

In her search for happiness, Rubin kept stumbling upon the Dalai Lama’s book, The Art of Happiness. The Buddhist view of life had always fascinated her, so she decided to get more deeply involved in it during her project. The book introduced her to the key concept of mindfulness. The idea behind it is to pay more conscious and unbiased attention to all things in the here and now instead of being constantly plagued by the past or obsessed with the future.

And so, one of the final phases in her happiness project was to experiment with techniques for opening one’s consciousness in order to become more mindful of things.

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Worum geht es in The Happiness Project?

What is happiness and how can we bring more of it into our lives? Gretchen Rubin asked herself this question because although she fulfilled all the prerequisites for a happy life – an intact family, a good job and enough money for a rainy day – she found herself frequently unhappy. During her year-long Happiness Project, she read about various techniques and theories on increasing happiness and tried to become happier with their help.

Wer The Happiness Project lesen sollte

Anyone who wants to boost the little bits of happiness in their everyday lives
Anyone looking for ideas and theories about happiness
Anyone in need of concrete suggestions about how to establish a balance between work, social life, family and self-fulfillment

Über den Autor

Gretchen Rubin studied law but decided to become a writer instead. Thanks to her blog, The Happiness Project, she became a famous blogger. In addition, she has written biographies of Winston Churchill and John F. Kennedy, as well as several self-help bestsellers, such as Power Money Fame Sex.

Kategorien mit The Happiness Project

Motivation & Inspiration Mindfulness & Happiness

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