Name: Hunger
Rating: 4.3 (50 reviews)
Author: Roxane Gay

What’s in it for me? Hear a remarkable story that rarely gets told.

There are a lot of memoirs out there, but few tell the kind of story Roxane Gay wants you to hear. It might not be a nice one, but it’s an important one to tell. Because the truth is, Dr. Gay isn’t alone in using unhealthy methods as a coping mechanism for a traumatic event.

In fact, the statistics are quite clear: the United States is struggling to deal with obesity, and if more people hear what Roxane has to say, we might be closer to understanding why all those diet and exercise fads aren’t working. We need more open hearts and minds, and, by asking us to understand Roxane’s story without prejudice, that’s exactly what this story can help us achieve.

In these blinks, you’ll discover

how a traumatic event causes pain years later; and
why The Biggest Loser is exploitative.

Roxane Gay had her life derailed by a violent and traumatic event.

Roxane Gay was born to a family of Haitian-Americans who lived in Omaha, Nebraska. In her early years, Roxane was raised Catholic and believed that if she did well in school she could grow up to be a respected doctor.

What she could never have expected was that a tragic act of violence would derail those plans and set her on a completely different course.

When she was just 12-years-old, Roxane was raped by her boyfriend and a group of other local youths. The event was devastating on many levels: since Roxane had already been intimate with this boy, what she experienced was a heavy feeling of shame – as if the attack had been her fault for defying the values of her Catholic upbringing. As a result, she couldn’t bear the thought of telling her parents about the rape.

So, she kept it to herself and continued to bury this secret deeper by overeating more and more food.

In the year following the attack, Roxane was sent to a prestigious boarding school where, away from the watchful eyes of her parents, she could eat as much as she wanted. In her mind, food wasn’t just a way to punish her body; she believed that the more she ate, the bigger she’d get and therefore the less vulnerable she’d be to another attack.

Roxane was already old enough to understand that fat women aren’t what society thinks of as desirable. So, as she quickly began to put on weight, part of her knew she was becoming sexually invisible to predatory men.

For a while, Roxane continued playing the part of the obedient Catholic girl who was expected to become a doctor, and her good grades got her into the pre-med program at Yale University. But as she began her junior year, she couldn’t keep up the act any longer – so she dropped out of school to go and live with a potential partner she met online.

At Yale, Roxane felt like she had to deny the reality of who she saw herself as being now: someone ruined. Unable to cope with this any longer, she was about to start a new chapter where she’d be treated as poorly as she felt.

Society has little regard for the lives of the overweight or the psychology behind obesity.

Even though there’s a lot of concern about an obesity epidemic in the United States, few Americans make any effort to be sympathetic to overweight people.

The moment Roxane Gay leaves her home, she is always trying to take up as little space as possible. But the people she crosses paths with don’t see her as someone trying to mind her own business and go about her day. They see her as a fat lady who’s taking up too much of their precious space.

It’s hard to escape the humiliation and harassment that comes with obesity.

While weight gain began as a way for Roxane Gay to become invisible to sexual predators, it had the unfortunate side effect of bringing her unwanted attention in other areas.

One thing that has been particularly humiliating is the way complete strangers use her weight as an excuse to interfere in her life and make decisions for her.

Roxane continues to work on accepting her past and treating herself with more kindness.

These days, Roxane Gay often finds herself dealing with two types of frustration. The first is directed at herself for being unable to control her weight; other times she’s frustrated at society for dictating how she’s supposed to look.

But in between these emotions, Roxane is finding that it is possible to be kind to herself.

Kernaussagen in Hunger