One Decision summary

Here’s a scenario: Keia has been working at a company for about a year. She feels it’s time for a raise. But as she considers bringing it up with her manager, Keia starts telling herself that she’ll get rejected. She imagines that her manager will say she hasn’t earned it, or that the company can’t afford it. Soon, she talks herself out of even broaching the subject.

Now, Keia probably wouldn’t call herself a fortune-teller. But in this scenario, she’s behaving like one. And she’s not alone. We often convince ourselves that we know what’s going to happen. And then we make decisions based on those predictions. But more often than not, those predictions are baseless. 

Have you ever found yourself jumping to a conclusion after one small incident? Maybe you made a mistake after a few days in a new role and then convinced yourself that you weren’t cut out for the job. Or maybe a harsh review led you to believe that a colleague didn’t like you.

In both these instances, there’s a negative force at play. It’s called overgeneralizing. 

Picture a large oak tree in the middle of an open field. Its trunk is strong and solid, and it’s been standing for many decades. Just a few feet away from the oak tree, there’s a tall, thin palm tree. Unlike the oak, the palm’s trunk is flexible.

Now, let’s say that an incredibly powerful wind blows through the field for several hours. 

Let’s face it, making important decisions can be incredibly difficult. So much so that we sometimes go round in circles. 

We weigh the pros and cons repeatedly, imagining every possible outcome. We ask everyone for their opinion. Eventually, we settle on a decision. Or at least we think we do. All it takes is a tiny, nagging thought or a comment about something we haven’t considered, and we’re back at square one. Indecision like this can be very frustrating. This negative force is confusion. It doesn’t just overwhelm us. It holds us back. 

When was the last time you felt blinded by anger or like you were bursting with joy? How about crippled by anxiety?

Emotions are completely natural. Your emotions protect you, provide motivation, and help you form relationships. But they can also be overwhelming. They can drive you to make decisions based on what you feel, instead of what’s actually happening. And in most cases, such decisions aren’t in your best interests.

If you’re a fan of award shows, then you’ve likely noticed something they all have in common. The awards might celebrate music, movies, or TV shows, but whatever the category, winners always get up on stage and acknowledge the people who supported them. 

Sure, the winners sang hit songs alone. Or they acted in front of the cameras solo. But no matter how talented they are, they couldn’t have succeeded without the help of others. And this is true for every person, whether they’re building an acting career or simply navigating important life decisions.