Got Your Attention? summary

Have you ever heard the saying, “When you advertise fire extinguishers, open with the fire?”

This explains a helpful fact. People tend not to know what they want until you show it to them.

While humility can be an admirable trait, being too humble can quickly become your greatest weakness, especially when trying to get the attention of your boss or any other authority.

In fact, successfully competing for the attention of important people means showing and proving your competitive advantage.

Have you ever felt that a person stopped listening to you even before you began speaking?

It’s a common reaction of conversation partners who are prejudiced against you – a result of a person saying “no” in his mind, before you even open your mouth.

Have you ever been really excited about a project and called up a friend to pitch it? You felt he would be excited too, but in the end, he didn’t seem turned on at all.

What happened? Perhaps it was the language you used in your pitch. When trying to persuade people, it’s important to speak in the terms that they use on a regular basis.

We’ve all been in situations in which an older person drags on, telling stories about the past. Whether about some ancient movie star or out-of-print book, why is it that old stuff can be so boring?

Often, when people tune out while listening to someone speak about something “before their time,” it’s not because they are rude, it’s just because they can’t relate.

Imagine that you’re presenting the results of your research. You begin with all the relevant statistics you’ve calculated, and quickly you are looking at a sea of bored faces. What happened?

Connecting to people requires more than just presenting a theory. For most people, agreeing with your hypothetical scenario isn’t enough; they need to be able to apply your knowledge practically.

It can be seriously difficult to put yourself in someone else’s shoes; sympathizing with others can be even harder. People can relate easily to one person, but not to many at once.

So while we can bemoan the fate of one hungry child, an entire country filled with hungry children dulls our sense of empathy. This situation is described in psychology as the empathy telescope, which states that it’s easier for one person to care about another person than about many people.