Magic Words summary

How many times do you use or hear the word “yes” in your day-to-day life? Probably, you could handle a few more yeses in your life.

Why? Well, all humans fear rejection. We’ve evolved to be that way: being connected with others by being part of a group helps us survive. So the word “yes” is ingrained in our psyche; we love hearing it. It’s the ultimate magic word.

Imagine you’re in a noisy, crowded bar. You can barely hear the person right next to you, but someone across the room says your name and, just like that, they have your attention. Why does this happen?

We’re biologically programed to pay attention to the sound of our name. That’s why names are such great magic words.

People naturally want to understand the reasons behind the things they see and do. If you can give them a reason, they’ll be more motivated to act.

That’s why “because” is the next magic word. A Harvard professor once did a study on the power of “because” by using the line for the photocopy machine in her office. First, she tried to cut the line without giving any explanation for her rudeness. She was successful 60 percent of the time.

How do you feel when someone asks you for help? It makes you feel important and needed, doesn’t it? That’s what makes “help” such a powerful magic word.

However, if you need help or someone offers you help, you have to work with that person in a specific way. Say you ask for help with writing some code, for example, and the person who volunteers is a beginner. Should you let them give it a go?