How to Live summary

One of the author’s favorite fictional characters is Zorba, hero of the novel Zorba the Greek. Zorba is boisterous and larger than life. He embraces each day with enthusiasm, as if he may die at any minute.

For the rest of us, of course, that all-or-nothing attitude is more rare. We’re torn between wanting to embrace life and running on autopilot. When each day asks so much, it can be easy to fall into a routine to meet the constant demands. But living like this takes a toll on our well-being.

St. Benedict was smart. He knew that putting together a community of individuals could easily lead to fights, resentments, and any number of squabbles that cause problems for groups. In particular, he was worried about the harm that can come from gossip and complaining. 

Many chapters in The Rule deal directly with these concerns. They talk about how to build community so that we may live not just meaningfully, but peacefully. 

Building the perfect life is an impossible task. The same goes for relationships, family, community – there will always be problems. So don’t try for perfection; instead, focus on how you can reduce the problems that come your way and look for the best approaches to resolving them.

As we’ve learned, for his part, Benedict stressed the importance of humility, silence, and having a rich inner life to find balance. But those weren’t the only things. 

As you’re probably well aware, forgiveness isn’t always easy to come by. If someone’s hurt you or betrayed your trust, it can seem simpler to cut them off than find a path to forgiveness. But this kind of drastic action can leave you saddled with heavy emotional baggage. And in the long run, that’s difficult to carry.

St. Benedict knew this. He was certainly no pushover – the consequence for repeatedly breaking his rules was, ultimately, excommunication – but he also had a policy of forgiveness. 

Consider how you might like to be remembered when you’re gone. What will keep you in people’s minds? Will it be the wealth you’ve accumulated? The number of cars or homes you own? 

For Benedictine monks, it is the actions and the work that we undertake that will last. 

Piers Sellers was an astronaut who made three trips to the International Space Station. These journeys allowed him a view of planet Earth that few have ever seen. It was only upon seeing the planet from the distance of space that he understood how fragile and precious Earth is.

We tend to think of the world’s resources as being at our disposal. But in reality, we are only borrowing. Our homes, our relationships, our bodies, as well as our rivers and forests, are only on loan to us. They’ve been placed in our trust, and it is up to us to care for them.

Some of the world’s greatest minds – historical figures like Aristotle and Plato – talk of work as something that gets in the way of the important business of thinking. 

The author’s had the same problem. She’s experienced the struggle of doing work that she loves while also trying to find the time for a more contemplative life. She loves her career as a journalist, but she’s never found happiness in breaking the big story or seeing her name in print.