The Whole-Brain Child summary

Have you ever tried arguing with a two-year-old? If you have, you know it’s almost always a lost cause, and here’s why:

The human brain has two hemispheres, often referred to simply as two brains. Each has completely different functions from the other. The left hemisphere takes longer to develop and is devoted to order, specializing in language and logic, while the right side is geared toward the big picture, not details, with an expertise in nonverbal signals, images and feelings.

When your toddler throws a tantrum, are you in control or is she? Well, the answer has to do with balancing the higher and lower, or primitive, parts of the human brain.

The primitive part of your brain controls basic functions that keep you alive, like breathing, impulses and strong emotions such as anger. When this aspect controls your behavior, you’re more likely to end up throwing a temper tantrum just like your toddler, or doing some other foolishly impulsive thing like telling a friend that they’re ugly.

Does your child ever freeze up in harmless situations? If so, a negative implicit memory may be to blame. After all, our memories influence our actions – even those memories we aren’t aware of.

For instance, when we talk about memories, it’s usually about those we can consciously access. These are our explicit memories, like the time your friend found a dead mouse in her salad. But there’s another type of memory called implicit memory. These are memories that we’re not consciously aware of, but which guide our actions.

You may be just one person, but your individual self contains lots of different parts, such as your dreams, thoughts and sensations. These aspects are products of your upper brain and other cerebral regions that surround it like a wheel of awareness.

For your child to stay flexible and develop every facet of his personality, he needs to develop his own awareness of his mind. Many children can get stuck focusing on particular notions or goals, like the ambition to be the fastest runner in their grade, while forgetting about other aspects of their personal growth.

So, mindsight is essential for integrating the different aspects of oneself – but it’s also a tool for understanding the minds of others. The brain is a social organ, designed to be shaped and reshaped through interaction with other people. In fact, we only thrive by learning to attune ourselves to other humans.

After all, our brains are equipped with a special type of neuron to help shape them through social interactions. These are called mirror neurons and they come into play when we see people acting with intention. Pretty soon, our mirror neurons cause us to do or want the same thing as the people we’re observing.