Let's Talk Buchzusammenfassung - das Wichtigste aus Let's Talk

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Zusammenfassung von Let's Talk

Name: Let's Talk
Rating: 4.5 (163 reviews)
Author: Therese Huston

Therese Huston

Make Effective Feedback Your Superpower

4.5 (163 Bewertungen)

23 Min.

Kurz zusammengefasst

Let's Talk by Therese Huston is a book on improving communication skills, with specific tips and strategies based on research. It emphasizes listening, collaboration, and constructive feedback, making it a useful resource for individuals and organizations.

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What’s in it for me? Develop an engaged and motivated workforce who know where they stand.

As a manager, you don’t need to be told that employee morale is critical. Motivated employees are productive employees, and productive employees make for profitable companies. But how do you stay connected with your team, and ensure their spirits are high? In a nutshell: quality feedback.

Giving great feedback is no easy feat. Too often, managers have to figure it out through trial and error. How much praise is too much? How do you know if you’re actually getting through to people?

That’s where these blinks come in. They give clear and actionable advice on how to deliver praise, coaching, and evaluations in a way that will generate better work and more engaged employees. Feedback doesn’t have to be a chore – used correctly, it’s one of the best tools managers have at their disposal.

In these blinks, you’ll learn

the difference between me-strengths and we-strengths;
why it’s hard to praise too much; and
how to have that awkward convo you’ve been dreading.

To give effective feedback, think about whether your employee needs appreciation, coaching, or evaluation.

The first step to understanding how to give effective feedback is to know exactly what kind of a conversation you need to have. After all, you can’t know if a conversation went well if you don’t know what you were trying to accomplish, right?

Since most people aren’t taught effective feedback skills, they might think that there are only two types of feedback: positive or negative. But that’s not a useful framing – in reality, different situations call for different types of positive or negative feedback. Instead, you should think of all feedback as being either appreciation, coaching, or evaluation.

The key message of this blink is: To give effective feedback, think about whether your employee needs appreciation, coaching, or evaluation.

Appreciation is the most straightforward kind of feedback – it’s positive recognition. Did an employee lead a great presentation this morning? Tell them that! That’s appreciation.

To make appreciation most effective, it should be delivered immediately after the event, when it’s still fresh in the memories of you and your employee. This will help reinforce the behavior, and the praise will be most significant in that moment. Appreciation is also especially critical for building relationships. At a deeper level, it’s really about telling others that they’re valued. For this reason, appreciation is particularly important for new employees, or employees doing a task for the first time. It’s a great way to make them feel at home.

Now for coaching, the second of our three types of feedback. Coaching is advice designed to help the other person learn and grow. Maybe an employee led a presentation that was pretty good overall, but when it came time to answer follow-up questions he struggled to explain things clearly. Good coaching would explain where the employee struggled, and give him advice on how to avoid it next time. Coaching doesn’t have to be in-depth: sometimes just checking in with a quick bit of advice can work wonders.

And what about our final type of feedback, evaluation? Evaluation lets the other person know where they stand. When you tell an employee that her sales numbers are third on their team, that’s evaluation. This is where you can let your employee know if she’s meeting expectations or likely to receive that promotion she’s been hoping for.

One important note – make sure you’re clear to distinguish coaching from evaluation. When an employee wants coaching but gets an evaluation, or when they think an evaluation is just friendly advice, the result is confusion on both sides. And this can lead to considerable damage.

When giving feedback, adopt a flexible, compassionate, and forgiving mindset.

Once you know what you want to accomplish with your feedback, you need to make sure you’re approaching it with the right mindset. Too often, attempts at giving feedback fall short because your mindset acts as a barrier to winning the trust of the person you’re talking to.

And trust is critical: would you take advice from someone if you didn’t think he had your best intentions at heart? Of course not. So when it comes time to start a conversation with an employee, make sure you have a mindset that will allow you to form a connection. In order to achieve this, you’ll need to avoid three common mindset traps.

Make your good intentions known by spelling out what you want for your employee and acknowledging her worries.

The road to ineffective feedback is paved with good intentions. Most people want the best for their employees, but something goes wrong when it’s time to actually give feedback and it ends with a frustrated boss, an employee who feels attacked, and a problem that hasn’t been solved.

So how do you convert those good intentions into a positive outcome? Put simply, you have to make them known. No matter how strongly you want to do good, you won’t do any if you aren’t open and vocal about wanting your employee to succeed. Don’t assume it’s obvious, and don’t worry if it feels like overkill: start out by letting her know, I’m in your corner.

Listen relationally, not critically, and validate your employee’s feelings.

Here’s the dirty little secret of giving effective feedback: what to say and how to say it is the easy part. The really difficult part about giving feedback is listening.

No matter what the job, the people best at it are the best listeners. This doesn’t only apply to jobs where the importance of listening is obvious, like doctors and sales reps. Managers at fast-food chains who listen well also report fewer accidents at their franchises.

Be generous with your praise, especially for we-strengths that lift up a team.

Giving out positive recognition is one of the best parts of being a manager – it makes both giver and receiver feel good, it motivates continued good work, and it’s just fun. After all, who doesn’t like to be praised?

It shouldn’t come as a surprise, then, that the first bit of advice for giving effective praise is to do it more. On the whole, people don’t feel like they get praised enough. In fact, a 2011 Globoforce survey found that only one in four US workers believe they get enough praise at work.

Give negative feedback with a growth mindset and in a private setting.

If you’ve ever gotten a “we need to talk” email from a supervisor, you know that negative feedback is intensely stressful and threatening. Research has shown that this stress actually impairs cognitive function. The rush of stress hormones inhibits the brain’s ability to recall memories and think about multiple concepts.

Unfortunately, being a manager means that sometimes you’ll simply need to have difficult conversations. This is when you need to be extra attentive to how you approach your employee. When you're addressing poor performance, the principles of listening and forming a personal connection become more important than ever.

To avoid surprises, check in with your employees regularly.

Variety may be the spice of life, but when it comes to giving feedback, you want to avoid surprises at all costs. There’s no quicker way to alienate and stress your employees than hitting them with an evaluation that doesn’t align with how they thought they were doing.

Preventing this is pretty simple: check in with your team regularly. Don’t worry if you think you’re being redundant or obvious – it’s far more important that everyone knows where they stand at all times. Not only does this make your employees happier, but it also makes your job easier as well, by allowing you to nip issues in the bud before they become major problems.

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Worum geht es in Let's Talk?

Let’s Talk: Make Effective Feedback Your Superpower (2021) is a guide to handling one of the trickiest parts of being a manager – giving feedback. Dr. Therese Huston draws upon her cognitive psychology research and her experience as an educator and consultant to help you understand how to give feedback in a way that benefits everyone involved.

Wer Let's Talk lesen sollte

Managers
Anyone interested in effective communication
Bearers of bad news

Über den Autor

Dr. Therese Huston received her MS and PhD in cognitive psychology from Carnegie Mellon University. Huston was the founding director of the Center for Excellence in Teaching and Learning at Seattle University. She has written for the New York Times and the Harvard Business Review and has previously given talks at Microsoft, Amazon, TEDxStLouis, and Harvard Business School. Huston is the author of Teaching What You Don't Know and How Women Decide.

Kategorien mit Let's Talk

Kommunikation & Soft Skills Management & Leadership

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