Shoveling $h!t summary

Kass had just been wheeled into the recovery room after undergoing an emergency C-section. Thankfully, their newborn son, Cole, had been delivered healthy. Kass, however, wasn’t doing so well. Before the surgery, the epidural she’d received had clotted in her brain. This caused stroke-like symptoms –⁠ the entire left side of her body had drooped and gone numb. 

She was idly wondering whether her face would permanently be stuck like that when her husband and cofounder, Mike, gingerly placed a laptop on her stomach. “I hate to say this right now,” Mike said, “but Buick needs their ads up.”

The most important ads of their career were scheduled to go live. The 68th Masters Tournament would begin in four days, and professional golf tournaments played a huge role in the profitability of their company, Golf.com. There was no wiggle room. If Mike didn’t sell ads, and if Kass didn’t traffic and manage them, they’d have no revenue. No revenue, no company. 

Mike tried to cover for Kass when she went into labor early, but he didn’t know how to do her part of the job. So, just minutes after giving birth, she logged into the management platform and turned on the ads while Mike sung her praises.

Hearing this, you might be shocked and a little horrified. How could Kass and Mike have been worried about their revenue at a time like that?

But from Kass and Mike’s perspective, that’s how entrepreneurship works –⁠ for better or worse. This situation was far from an anomaly. When their first son was born, Kass took less than a week of maternity leave. Then, it was in the hospital after their third child was born that Mike had the idea for their next company, Buddy Media. 

As an entrepreneur, you have to accept that doing something meaningful to you comes at a cost. In Kass’s view, you can only do one thing really well at a time. If that one thing is starting and growing a business, then your relationships will suffer. Likewise, if relationships are the priority, your business will suffer.

Kass and Mike definitely felt the impact of prioritizing their business. They weren’t there for their kids as much as they would have wanted –⁠ though they never missed one of their kids’ plays, rehearsals, or games, they were always tired, never fully present. Plus, they developed almost no meaningful friendships outside of work, and both experienced major health issues. They couldn’t fully take care of themselves physically, mentally, or emotionally.

Are you willing to embrace these realities? If not, you probably shouldn’t become an entrepreneur. But if you are, there are ways of managing the imbalance as best you can.

For Kass and Mike, they openly discussed and agreed about sacrificing time with their kids when they were young so that they would⁠ hopefully⁠ get more time with them later. They chose to focus on financial success to provide their kids with a better life and to improve the world through philanthropy. That wasn’t necessarily the right decision –⁠ but it was a conscious one made through honest communication. 

Before taking the plunge and starting a business, do a lot of self-reflection and make sure the tradeoffs are ones you’re willing to make. Remember: you will sacrifice some combination of friendships, family, and health. Are you still ready to grab that shovel?