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The 9 Best Books On How To Improve Your Sex Life In 2022

Make 2022 your most intimate year ever with these best books on how to improve your sex life.
by Rob Gillham | May 12 2022
Better Sex


When it comes to sexuality, our sex lives, and intimacy in general, society has constructed a taboo around sex education. Unfortunately, this means that any free-thinking and self-reflecting adult has to teach themselves about the ins and outs of intimacy. For a well-rounded education, look no further than these best books on how to improve your sex life.

Reading the best books on how to improve your sex life can provide you with invaluable sex education. The Blinkist app makes it easy to stay on top of bestselling and lesser-known nonfiction books, as well as condensed versions of your favorite podcasts. Blinkist gathers powerful ideas and key insights from nonfiction books and shares them as 15-minute reads and listens. The app’s library features diverse content across 5,000 titles with 27 categories like psychology, philosophy, and personal development.

Below, you will find guides on having better sex, life stories that teach you how to be more intimate, and research-based studies on how to spice up the bedroom. So, whether you are seeking to increase sexual satisfaction in your existing relationships or are looking to explore sexuality, non-monogamy, or simply want to find better sex partners, there’s a book on this list for you. 


Pleasure Activism: The Politics of Feeling Good by Adrienne Maree Brown

Adrienne Maree Brown (often styled as adrienne maree brown) is a writer and activist involved in numerous community outreach programs, including the Harm Reduction Coalition and the Ruckus Society

“Pleasure activism is the work we do to reclaim our whole, happy, and satisfiable selves from the impacts, delusions, and limitations of oppression and/or supremacy.”
– Adrienne Maree Brown, Pleasure Activism: The Politics of Feeling Good.

Her work Pleasure Activism offers an introduction to the politics of pleasure. It explores how we can break free of repression and marginalization – and instead embrace the feelings of freedom. It offers ways to gain a better understanding of past traumas and move forward with a deeper connection to our bodies and our communities.


Shameless: A Sexual Reformation by Nadia Bolz-Weber

Nadia Bolz-Weber is a public theologian, an ordained Lutheran pastor, and the founder of the House for All Sinners and Saints – a social justice-oriented and queer-inclusive church in Denver, Colorado.

“So my argument in this book is this: we should not be more loyal to an idea, a doctrine, or an interpretation of a Bible verse than we are to people. If the teachings of the church are harming the bodies and spirits of people, we should rethink those teachings.”
– Nadia Bolz-Weber, Shameless: A Sexual Reformation

Her work Shameless explores how the church’s view of sex and sexuality as sinful has guilted and shamed its congregants. Through personal stories and those shared with her by members of her church, the author demonstrates the harmful effects of the church’s teachings. She offers a new, inclusive way of approaching sexuality and ensuring fulfilling sex lives for everyone.


The Science of Kissing: What Our Lips Are Telling Us by Sheril Kirshenbaum

Many of us enjoy a passionate kiss, but few people understand the true significance of the simple smooch. The Science of Kissing explains why kissing is so rooted in both human and animal biology, what happens physiologically when we do it and why it’s a lot more important than you may realize. 

“Perhaps it will be possible to ‘kiss’ a loved one through the computer, or maybe virtual technology will allow us to experience the kiss of a celebrity or idealized partner. Just as with inventions like space shuttles and smartphones, the coming decades will reveal new kissing technologies that we can’t begin to imagine in the present day.”
– Sheril Kirshenbaum

The Science of Kissing is based on the latest studies and theories, but it isn’t a dense science book. Sheril Kirshenbaum’s unique voice gives the scientific information light and engaging touch. In her work, you will learn about the kind of kissing that appeals to men and women (they aren’t the same) and what animals can teach us about the humble kiss. 


Slow Sex: The Path to Fulfilling and Sustainable Sexuality by Diana Richardson

Diana Richardson has been teaching meditation and Tantra to couples since 1993. Her work Slow Sex makes a robust case for a deceleration of our love lives in order to have more fulfilling sex and deeper, happier relationships. 

“My first really long lovemaking experience was thirteen hours nonstop, from dusk to dawn. At that point, I had been more accustomed to five or six hours at a time. And then, at some time further on in my exploration, my new lover and I were in bed for a solid twenty-one days, apart from the minimum of time required to care for bodily needs.”
– Diana Richardson, Slow Sex: The Path to Fulfilling and Sustainable Sexuality

In our hectic and consumer-oriented society, sex is often used as a quick fix for physical satisfaction – but this can leave us feeling empty. Slow sex helps us unfold the potential of our sexuality by learning how to make love in a conscious, mindful way that is ultimately as healing as it is stimulating.


Urban Tantra: Sacred Sex for the Twenty-First Century by Barbara Carrellas

No, this isn’t a book about getting intimate under a railway bridge. Urban Tantra is a no-nonsense, dogma-free guide to Tantra – a spiritual practice that will give you a fresh look at your sex life. It shows that Tantra can work for anyone; it’s as helpful to a BDSM practitioner who wants to intensify her rituals as it is for a hurried parent seeking to reconnect with his sexuality. To practice Tantra, you don’t need to master complex positions or learn to chant in Sanskrit. All you need are a few simple tools that’ll help you become more mindful and drop into your body.

“The person in New York is more likely to want and need a harder touch in order to crack through the armor they have built up to protect their hearts and other soft tender parts.”
– Barbara Carrellas, Urban Tantra: Sacred Sex for the Twenty-first Century

The author of Urban Tantra is a life coach, sex educator, workshop facilitator, university lecturer, motivational speaker, and theater artist. She is also the author of Ecstasy is Necessary: A Practical Guide to Sex, Relationships and Oh So Much More, and Luxurious Loving: Tantric Inspirations for Passion and Pleasure.


The State of Affairs by Esther Perel

Esther Perel is a psychotherapist who specializes in modern-day love, partnership, and dating. For over a decade, she has worked with a wide range of couples, counseling them through every variety of emotional difficulties, from betrayal to trust, and infidelity to forgiveness.

“Our partners do not belong to us; they are only on loan, with an option to renew—or not. Knowing that we can lose them does not have to undermine commitment; rather, it mandates an active engagement that long-term couples often lose. The realization that our loved ones are forever elusive should jolt us out of complacency, in the most positive sense.”
– Esther Perel, The State of Affairs

Her work, The State of Affairs, tackles the thorny subject of infidelity. Cheating is widely condemned as immoral, yet many people do it anyway at some point or another. This book offers a fresh look at infidelity and asks a difficult question: Is it such a bad thing after all?


Resurrecting Sex: Solving Sexual Problems and Revolutionizing Your Relationship by David Schnarch

 Sex can be something that can be incredibly difficult to get right for some couples. Resurrecting Sex is a guidebook for couples struggling to connect intimately and emotionally due to sexual dysfunction. It offers a holistic approach to addressing these issues and exploring the erotic potential of your relationship.

“We tell ourselves that intimacy (and marriage) takes two people who are willing to work at it-but, unfortunately, we rarely have the slightest inkling of our “job” assignments in this project.”
– David Schnarch

David Scharch’s work is for couples struggling in the bedroom, emotionally committed partners who want to enhance intimacy, and for those looking for sex and relationship insights.


Spiritual Partnership: The Journey to Authentic Power by Gary Zukav

Gary Zukav is a best-selling author who has appeared on the Oprah Winfrey Show numerous times. His work Spiritual Partnership is about the new relationships that can develop when we tap into deep, invisible consciousness. Becoming “multisensory” and engaging in spiritual partnerships with others will lead you to a life of freedom, joy, and authentic power.

“Within a few generations, all humans will be multisensory. They will experience not only the domain of space, time, matter, and duality that has been the totality of experience for most humans since the origin of humanity, but also nonphysical domains and dynamics that affect us and that we affect.”
– Gary Zukav, Spiritual Partnership: The Journey to Authentic Power


Real Love: The Art of Mindful Connection by Sharon Salzberg

 Do you want to learn how to handle conflict constructively? Do you suffer from low self-esteem and want to learn self-love? This book is for you. Real Love draws our attention to the habits and cultural conditioning that stop us from forming deep connections with others. 

“Once we are honest about our feelings, we can invite ourselves to consider alternative modes of viewing our pain and can see that releasing our grip on anger and resentment can actually be an act of self-compassion.”
– Sharon Salzberg, Real Love: The Art of Mindful Connection

Sharon Salzberg is a world-renowned teacher in the field of meditation. Author of the New York Times bestseller Real Happiness, she has been a pioneer in bringing mindfulness into mainstream culture. By inviting us to expand our notions of love and the ways in which we practice it in our day-to-day lives, Sharon Salzberg provides practical advice on how we can strengthen our relationships and experience more joy.


A Book Explained in 15 Minutes

With Blinkist, you can learn from the books above and have better sex in the time it takes to make a pot of coffee. Each explainer is only minutes long, but you don’t even have to find time to sit and read them. Blinkist books are available in audio format, so you can listen while commuting, walking the dog, or even with your partner in the bedroom. 

“If you want to expand your knowledge and get inspiration, but are juggling too much, there is always time for Blinkist.”
– 5-Star User Review

Want to have better sex and make stronger connections in 2022? Download Blinkist to get started and learn from thousands of books.

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