Triggers summary

Though we don’t like to admit it, we’re geniuses at inventing excuses to avoid change in our lives – even when that change would clearly benefit us. Why? Our belief triggers prevent us from making positive behavioral changes.

So what are belief triggers? Well, they’re inner beliefs that we create to justify resistance. One common belief trigger is that we already have enough wisdom to assess our own behavior. A belief trigger like this can dupe us into thinking that we’re capable of changing whenever we want to, which justifies our choice not to create change just yet.

If triggers are what hold us back from being better people, than the solution is simple: identify the triggers that affect us. Well, it’s easier said than done. We often don’t even know that we’re being influenced by triggers in our environment. So how can we increase our awareness of triggers?

One way to start identifying your triggers is by giving yourself feedback. Try the following exercise: Pick a behavioral goal you’re still pursuing – exercising in the morning, perhaps. Next, list the people and situations that influence whether you achieve this goal – maybe the urge to read your emails stops you from exercising.

Unfortunately, we’re often faced with environments that are more hostile than supportive. Just think of the numerous times your surroundings have prevented you from focusing on your work. Negative environments are hard to change, but by adapting your own approach, you can nip those negative triggers in the bud.

When you begin to make changes in your life, you’re a leader of your own behavior, and as a leader, you’ll need to assess what needs to be accomplished. This requires that you choose your leadership style accordingly.

Negative environmental triggers can force themselves upon us, and make us behave in unconstructive ways. But are we merely slaves to these triggers? Of course not, and to prove this, you can start by asking yourself active questions.

Active questions, unlike passive questions, get people to think about what they’re doing instead of what’s being done to them. So what do active questions look like?

You’re finally home after a day of hard work, and although you’ve got some thank you cards to write, you slump down on the couch and start watching TV. It’s a scene we all know, in its various shapes and forms. Why is it that our discipline slackens by day’s end?

It’s not because we’re inherently weak. We simply become depleted throughout the day. In fact, in the 1990s, psychology professor Roy F. Baumeister proposed that the limited ego strength we have becomes depleted throughout the day as we resist temptation, make decisions, and exercise our willpower in other ways.

Never changing a thing makes for a static and boring life. To avoid this, you’ve got to develop awareness. Only then can you truly grasp when and how change is needed.

Raise your awareness by asking the six engaging questions: Did I do my best to set clear goals?; Did I do my best to make progress toward my goals?; Did I do my best to find meaning?; Did I do my best to be happy?; Did I do my best to build positive relationships?; Did I do my best to be fully engaged?