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5 mins

Simplify Your Life: Sarah Knight On How To Care Less And Get More

In this episode of Simplify, Caitlin talks to bestselling author and self-help “anti-guru,” Sarah Knight, about how to stop people-pleasing and get what you want — without becoming a jerk!
by Natallia Darozhkina | Sep 6 2018

How much of your life do you spend pleasing those around you? Maybe it’s time to be honest with yourself, invest time in the things that really matter, and start weeding out unnecessary obligations to people you don’t really like. But how exactly are you supposed to do that?

In this episode of Simplify, Sarah Knight will help you start a process of mental decluttering and show you how to develop your personal “f*ck budget”, i.e. the number of f*cks you are prepared to dispense on any given day. Use it as a filter to make sure you’re spending your time, energy, and money on the things that actually matter to you.

“It is essential that you ask for what you want and push back on what you don’t.”
Sarah Knight

Listen to this episode to get more confident about asking for what you want in life, and learn how to get it without feeling guilty or worrying about what others think.

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Who’s Sarah Knight?

Sarah Knight
Photo of Sarah Knight by Alfredo Esteban

Sarah Knight is the author of international bestsellers The Life-Changing Magic of Not Giving a F*ck and Get Your Sh*t Together. Before becoming an “anti-guru,” she graduated with honors from Harvard University and spent fifteen years working in New York City’s top publishing houses. Sarah’s bold decision to quit that career and move to the Dominican Republic underpins much of the advice in her bestselling No Fucks Given Guides.

Sarah Knight’s recommended reads

1. The Favorite Sister by Jessica Knoll

This fiction bestseller tells the story of five extremely successful self-made women who agree to appear on a reality TV series set in New York City called Goal Diggers. It becomes one of America’s most popular shows, as viewers become hooked on what the fiercely competitive cast is capable of doing in order to reach the top. But no one foresees the twist that happens in season 4.

Comment from Sarah: “It’s just so sharp, and so insightful about women, and power, and ambition, and money, and also, you know, the way women are portrayed and pit against each other. So I highly recommend it…”

Educated is the memoir and autobiography of Tara Westover – the seventh child of Mormon survivalist parents. Born sometime in September 1986 with no birth certificate issued, Westover grew on a remote mountain in Idaho. At the age of 17, she chooses to leave home and get a formal education – the decision which drives her book, and has changed her life.

Comment from Sarah: “…Educated by Tara Westover is a memoir. And the author grew up in a large fundamentalist family, who were all homeschooled, and kept off the grid by their parents in the mountains, and just had a very alien upbringing. A lot of people would find it just frankly horrifying but also just incredibly strange how these kids were raised. And she really was able to escape this extremely narrow-minded, dangerous world that she was brought up in. […] it was a fascinating, absolutely page-turning, beautifully-written memoir – Educated. And I loved it.”

Extra credit reading

If you would like to dive deeper into some of the topics Sarah Knight covers in this Simplify episode, check out this book list composed by Ben and Caitlin!

Rethinking Narcissism provides fresh perspectives on what we typically understand as arrogance or vanity. This book situates narcissism both historically and culturally, explaining the spectrum of narcissism and its different forms; they also provide helpful strategies for recognizing and dealing with the narcissists you might know.

The Reason for Flowers is about the origin, reproduction and effects of these amazing pieces of evolutionary artwork. This book explains how flowers have sex, why they’re so beautiful, and why humans have become so infatuated with them.

The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up isn’t just a guide to decluttering, it’s a bestseller that’s changed lives in Japan, Europe and the United States. The Wall Street Journal even called Marie Kondo’s Shinto-inspired “KonMari” technique “the cult of tidying up.” Kondo explains in detail the many ways in which your living space affects all aspects of your life, and how you can ensure that each item in it has powerful personal significance. By following her simple yet resonant advice, you can move closer to achieving your dreams.

What’s Simplify?

Simplify is a podcast for anybody who’s taken a close look at their habits, their happiness, their relationships, or their health and thought “There’s got to be a better way to do this.” We talk to bestselling writers, productivity wizards, sex geniuses, and happiness experts to find it for you.

Simplify is made with love by Blinkist. Click here to try Blinkist free for 14 days with the voucher code: budget

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Talk to us!

We want to hear from you! Reach us at [email protected].

If you want to say hi to Ben and Caitlin in the meantime, you can find them on Twitter: @bsto and @CaitlinSchiller.

Who made this?

Your hosts are Caitlin Schiller and Ben Schuman-Stoler.

Research and production assistance by Nat Darozhkina and Terence Mickey, sound and editing by Ben Jackson and Ody Constantinou.

Thanks to Nico Guiang for our awesome intro and outro music. Listen more on Soundcloud or check him out on Facebook.

Got links?

Sarah Knight’s website.
The No Fucks Given Guides.
Sarah Knight’s TED Talk.

Read the transcript here!

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